New feature: question everything!

My favorite thing about having a Weblog is the interactivity. I love it when readers write in with what’s on their mind or with their questions.

So, I’m adding to the right navigation a feature that encourages more of this—Submit a Question. It's right near the top, just below the subscribe link.

Is there any subject you’d like discussed more on this blog? Do you have any questions I can float with the blog audience? Ask away! Sure, I’ll always give an answer of my own, but the best part will be seeing the responses from everyone else.

Hope to hear from you soon!

Have a great weekend,

@}-->--

Laura

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Divorce and happiness

Maybe it’s time to talk about my own divorce.

A very dear friend called me after my recent blog entry about marriage and happiness, to ask if what I wrote was really what I meant. She felt again from my words the pressure some people feel that if they divorce, they’re not “genuine Christian Scientists.” And that’s so *not* what I meant that I wanted to clarify with my own experience.

I married my high school sweetheart at 21, right after we both attended colleges in different states. We barely knew each other, let alone having our own selves figured out. We separated about six years later, divorcing the following year.

My own happiness and his figured greatly into the decision to end it. I can see now that I was young and in hot pursuit of my own gratification on many levels. The times when I was most earnest about saving my marriage involved me suborning my personality so completely that I couldn’t sustain it. The pattern emerged that if one of us were happy, the other wasn’t. It was almost as though our happiness were mutually exclusive. We had no concept of working together to make the *marriage* happy.

One day it struck me that if this marriage were to work, one of us was going to have to change radically. I had already demonstrated that I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t make the changes that would make me the perfect wife for him, even though there were times when my acting was pretty convincing to friends and family. He not only showed no capacity to change, but I was also beginning to feel it was wrong to demand it of him.

The startling realization then came that he had the right to be himself. Being married to me was putting him in the position of receiving constant disapproval for who he was, and that hit me as very wrong. Who was I to impose that on him, especially if I loved him? Which I always did, making this transition all the more confusing. But the idea of my not having the right to even want him to be something other than who he was brought me some clarity.

So, I left. In listening to my agonizing one day, a close family friend said thoughtfully, “Maybe sometimes the divorce *is* the healing.” That comment released a lot of the burden I was feeling, and I’m so grateful to her for saying it.

My point about happiness in marriage is that happiness is a requirement. It’s not enough for the two people to be individually happy. The marriage itself, the combination of the two people and what they can build together, needs to be happy. Christian Science can encourage that happiness. Christian Science can also bring the clarity to know to end something that’s not working.

Maybe with what I know now and the maturity I would have been bringing to the table, my marriage could have worked out eventually. But that’s not the way it rolled out. Divorce allowed us both to form new homes and find our own versions of happiness.

Sometimes divorce *is* the healing. It was for me.

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How to share spiritual healing

Carrie left me a question yesterday:

When I'm talking about the ideas [of Christian Science], people want to know how it has worked in the past for other people, and I always find myself hesitating a little, because while I have my own healings to talk about, I wish I could point them to specific examples of things that have happened for other people and why. But I'm rather shy of the healings I've heard in church just because I don't know if I can honestly say I relate to the people individually. How do you handle people looking for examples?

This is an interesting dilemma, actually. Of course, we want to give compelling examples of healing, yet each case is so individual. When an inquirer asks about a particular condition (which usually they or someone they love most likely is suffering with), we could perhaps find an instance of the healing of that condition, but it doesn’t mean the spiritual treatment would be the same for them. So I don’t usually try to match condition with condition when I share healing stories.

Some things I try to remember when sharing:

• Share your own experiences. These are the most compelling, because 1) you’re right in front of the person and they know you’re telling the truth and 2) you can give details about the spiritual insight that helped you and why you turned to spiritual healing in the first place.
• Point out the last chapter in Science and Health. The healings in Fruitage are quite down-to-earth, and range from brief summaries to full-tilt explanations of spiritual growth. The testifiers are from all walks of life and all over the world. There’s a lot in there for inquirers to sample.
• Don’t make it sound like magic. Be sure to include an explanation of the healing agent, i.e., the new spiritual idea that transformed you or the person who had the healing. Just saying, “I prayed and then I was healed,” is nice, but it doesn’t show the *how* of spiritual healing.
• Include what you learned. Ancillary to the prior point, this is the element of healing that is truly universal and can be applied to any condition. If you gained a deeper understanding of, say, divine Love’s never ending care for you, be sure to share this when telling your story. The person might then go away thinking of that point rather than the condition they asked about, which brings them one step closer to understanding the mental nature of healing.

So I guess to answer Carrie’s question directly, I don’t often refer to other people’s healings when giving examples unless the people are very close to me. Unless I can answer the detailed questions that often come up about a particular healing example, sometimes a claim of healing that I didn’t actually eyewitness can add to the inquirer’s incredulity. I’d always want to be able to refer inquirers to a written source, such as another writer’s blog or the Christian Science magazines so they can read for themselves. It’s too easy to get the details wrong on healings I only heard once.

I think one of the most important aspects of this is that each of us who practice spiritual healing needs to speak up and tell our stories. There is so much healing going on that goes unrecorded. Being at-the-ready to share from our very lives makes a compelling case to those intrigued by the possibilities. Sometimes I’ll hear people say that their healings aren’t “good enough” to share, but this is false! Often it’s the gentler examples that make the most sense to inquirers, rather than always telling the earth-shattering ones.

What does everyone else do when sharing?

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Christian Science and medicine--err on the side of compassion

I had a nice long chat with Vicki from First Lessons in Christian Science yesterday. She had written to me after noticing Dennis’ comment from the other day about her site saying that it's unethical to treat yourself prayerfully if you’re using medicine. With her permission, I thought I’d share some of what she wrote to me.

Hi. I was reading your blog this morning, and I was alarmed when I read the comment by Dennis, which indicated that he had read on my web site that we should not pray for ourselves while taking medicine. I thought "why would I say that?! I believe we can pray anytime!" Since I wrote that about six years ago, I had to go back through it to find what I did say. … I suppose [it] was written awkwardly. I thought I was saying you could pray for yourself, but wanted to get across that if you believe the problem is real and are taking medicine to cure it, then it would be at cross-purposes to do a specific CS treatment—even for yourself. … Maybe you can help me find a better way to explain this, and I can change the web site.

… I would never want to discourage anyone from praying for themselves, no matter the circumstances. A paragraph [on my site] states this:

“For those who do choose to go to doctors, or need to in an emergency, you can also use the First Commandment. God never abandons us, no matter the situation. We can know that because there is only one Mind, there is no other mind separate from Him. Therefore, all the doctors and nurses involved in your case can only manifest perfect intelligence, perfect intuition, perfect skills, etc., as they diagnose and treat you. You can pray to know that because there is only one Spirit, or substance, and that is under God's control, then matter cannot have the intelligence to act by itself; it is under the dominion of God. Because God is the only source of Life, matter does not have life in it. You cannot lose your life as long as God is the only Life. Do not make matter or your body another god. Obey the First Commandment by sticking with God.”

Anyway, I just wanted to let Dennis know that I would not want to discourage anyone from praying for themselves.

In a subsequent email, Vicki said:

I've still been thinking over what I wrote—and the reason it gives me pause is that I have conflicting feelings about the medicine-CS thing. I know what Mrs. Eddy taught, but I also know how horrible it is to find oneself having to choose medicine or die, and being abandoned by the [spiritual healing] community just when you need help the most. But, I also saw how effective Christian Science prayer can be for one in a hospital situation—where the doctors were amazed at the progress—and this was combined with some medicine. So, what's the answer—is there ONE for all?

This last question is the crux of the matter, at least to me. Do any of us have the authority or wisdom to say there’s one right way for everyone? Doesn’t it depend on where one is on the spiritual path? Can we ever truly see into the heart of another and judge for them what they should do?

I’ve often asked myself this question as well: What has done the most damage to the Christian Science movement—people using medicine, or people ostracizing those who do? I almost think we need to do some catch-up in this area, to again make it clear that Christian Science is about love not judgment. Perhaps this means we have to err on the side of tolerance of each others’ choices for a time while we again shore up what it means to heal spiritually. At this time, it seems to me that expressing compassion, love, harmony, and brotherly kindness as the hallmark of Christian Science will do more for the health of the movement than unbending rules and regulations.

I welcome your thoughts on this! Someday maybe we’ll have a Website where we can discuss these issues freely. In the meantime, feel free to share your ideas here.

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Marriage, happiness and spiritual growth

I don’t write much about a subject that I’m fascinated with, but which remains largely theoretical to me—marriage. I pore over the chapter in Science and Health at least once a year, trying to prepare myself for the eventuality (if it ever comes), but also to learn how to support those who are struggling in their marriages. And I’ve found some interesting themes in the chapter that have served me well in any relationship I’ve had.

One theme in Mary Baker Eddy’s chapter on marriage is happiness. I went through the chapter once and marked all the instances of happiness and words related to it: joy, enjoyment, gladness, pleasing, smiles, amusement. In 14 pages, these concepts occur 24 times.

I believe MBE gave us then the key to a successful marriage—happiness. A marriage can be wealthy or poor, lengthy or new, famous or obscure, but if it’s happy, we count it as a success. And the best way to achieve happiness is to make this a priority. The idea, I think (and correct me if I’m wrong, those of you who are married), is not so much to be happy ourselves or to make the other person happy, but to work to ensure that the *marriage* is happy. The marriage is a third thing that the two partners are striving to create together.

This line of thinking clarified for me a passage that had often seemed problematic:

The nuptial vow should never be annulled, so long as its moral obligations are kept intact; but the frequency of divorce shows that the sacredness of this relationship is losing its influence, and that fatal mistakes are undermining its foundations. Separation never should take place, and it never would, if both husband and wife were genuine Christian Scientists. Science inevitably lifts one's being higher in the scale of harmony and happiness. --Science and Health

I remember the day that I gleaned a new insight on the last two sentences—there a causal relationship there. *Because* Science inevitably “lifts one’s being higher in the scale of … happiness,” to be a genuine Christian Scientist is to be happy. Therefore, separation need never take place, because a marriage between two such Scientists will be happy.

I loved the idea of including happiness in the definition of what it means to be a Christian Scientist. It brought the discipline of spiritual practice out of a gloomy, self-flagellating realm into joy, light and hope. We are meant to be happy. Happiness is an indicator that we’re seeing things correctly. If we’re not happy, it’s just a reminder or a clue to adjust toward the Divine, where happiness awaits us.

Married or not, you’re entitled to happiness. It’s a requirement on the path of spiritual progress. Yay!

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"... thy Savior comes to thee."

This beautiful poem brought inspiration to my prayer yesterday, so I thought I'd share it. It's by Rosa Turner, and can be found in the Christian Science Hymnal. If you like music with your poems, the tune is "Danny Boy," or Londonderry Air. (The music will start as soon as you click the link -- open it in a new window if you want to listen and read along.)

O dreamer, leave thy dreams for joyful waking,
O captive, rise and sing, for thou art free;
The Christ is here, all dreams of error breaking,
Unloosing bonds of all captivity.

He comes to bless thee on his wings of healing;
To banish pain, and wipe all tears away;
He comes anew, to humble hearts revealing
The mounting footsteps of the upward way.

He comes to give thee joy for desolation,
Beauty for ashes of the vanished years;
For every tear to bring full compensation,
To give thee confidence for all thy fears.

He comes to call the dumb to joyful singing;
The deaf to hear; the blinded eyes to see;
The glorious tidings of salvation bringing.
O captive, rise, thy Saviour comes to thee.

It's so sad, yet so uplifting, and such a lovely benediction. Blessings for the weekend, everybody.

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More on healing and medicine

Got some cool comments about the healing and medicine blog entry earlier this week. Here they are, slightly edited. You can read the originals at the entry.

Elizabeth said...

Thanks for these thoughts, Laura! I just always try to remember that it is *Christian* Science. The Christian part - expression of Love and Truth - comes first. Mary Baker Eddy seems to have always been emphasizing the importance, criticalness of Love in healing. To me, Love doesn't exclude, doesn't create parameters for healing.

She and Jesus certainly provided great examples of this. In anything I've read - the Bible and bios on Eddy, I haven't seen them quiz someone who came for healing about what other treatments the person has been pursuing, what medication they might be on, etc., and then turn the person away because of those practices pursued. They just loved and healing followed. Something to strive for, in my book.

Kim said...

An interesting and important discussion. MBE also writes in SH "If Christian Scientists ever fail to receive aid from other Scientists, — their brethren upon whom they may call, — God will still guide them into the right use of temporary and eternal means. Step by step will those who trust Him find that "God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble." (p444)

Dennis R. said...

Thank you for addressing this issue. I was concerned a bit because I was reading [articles elsewhere]. In one them on the first commandment, the comment was made that it was even unethical to treat oneself if they are getting medical treatment.

I was trying to think of a loophole. I figured if someone was taking a maintenance type drug that it was not treatment because the purpose was not to treat the disease but just to help you get by similar to eyeglasses.

Some of these things are beyond our control because of other family members putting the pressure on because of their concern.

Your comments help put it into perspective.

Heather said...

In Sunday School, one of my teachers told me of when he was a child, he went and rolled around in poison ivy on purpose. When his mother asked him why, he said that as a Christian Scientist, he shouldn't fear the poison ivy.

His mom told him that CS also stood for common sense. :)

And that's what your post reminds me of -- always use common sense, and determine where you in the journey.

Emily said...

"In one them on the first commandment, the comment was made that it was even unethical to treat oneself if they are getting medical treatment."

I'm not sure where that idea came from. The very first time I called a practitioner, I was struggling with the conflict between my own desire to be healed through Christian Science and my husband's desire for me to have medical treatment. The claim was pretty scary, and he was understandably afraid that Christian Science -- which he didn't know anything about at the time and certainly wasn't going to trust with his wife's life -- would not work.

I asked the practitioner if she could give me CS treatment (which I was sure would be effective) while I played along with my husband's demand for medical intervention (which *I* wasn't willing to trust with my life!). She said that she couldn't do that, because she and the doctor would wind up working at odds with each other, so that neither would be able to help me, but she added: "Of course you always have the right to work for yourself from your own understanding."

The practitioner worked with me until the day of the medical procedure, and I worked from my own understanding at the same time. Although the claim was quite frightening, I had a sense of peace about the whole thing, and tests later confirmed my own diagnosis: I was perfectly fine and in absolutely no danger. Somehow the doctor even forgot to prescribe an antibiotic or a painkiller, both of which are customary following surgery -- and I forgot to need them. :)

Great stuff, thanks everyone for contributing!

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The Comforter

My recent reading of the Gospel of John included these (sometimes) enigmatic words about the Comforter:

John 14

16 And I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may abide with you for ever;

17 Even the Spirit of truth; whom the world cannot receive, because it seeth him not, neither knoweth him: but ye know him; for he dwelleth with you, and shall be in you.

18 I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you.

19 Yet a little while, and the world seeth me no more; but ye see me: because I live, ye shall live also.

20 At that day ye shall know that I am in my Father, and ye in me, and I in you.

25 These things have I spoken unto you, being yet present with you.

26 But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.

John 15

26 when the Comforter is come, whom I will send unto you from the Father, even the Spirit of truth, which proceedeth from the Father, he shall testify of me:

27 And ye also shall bear witness, because ye have been with me from the beginning.

John 16

7 It is expedient for you that I go away: for if I go not away, the Comforter will not come unto you; but if I depart, I will send him unto you.

12 I have yet many things to say unto you, but ye cannot bear them now.

13 Howbeit when he, the Spirit of truth, is come, he will guide you into all truth: for he shall not speak of himself; but whatsoever he shall hear, that shall he speak: and he will shew you things to come.

14 He shall glorify me: for he shall receive of mine, and shall shew it unto you.

So, how will we recognize the Comforter?

• The Comforter is the Spirit of Truth.
• The world (material existence) can't see the Comforter, but "ye" can—those who can perceive Christ—because the Comforter dwells within them.
• When the Comforter comes, you will know for sure your own oneness with God and Christ.
• The Comforter will teach us the things Jesus couldn't, and will explain Jesus' words fully.
• The Comforter will bear witness to Christ, and will enable us to do so.
• The Comforter won't talk about "himself," since "he's" not a person, but the Spirit of Truth. The Comforter will glorify Christ, and show us Christ.
• The Comforter is then teacher, witness, friend, illuminator, advocate, Truth.

To me, it's always made sense that the Comforter is not a being as much as an idea. The Comforter is the underlying reality of all things, what we need to know to have dominion and to witness (express) God. It speaks and we listen because it speaks the Truth. It's not itself something to worship, because it points to that which we must worship, the Holiest, the Divine. It clears the way, it shows the path, it lights the journey. The Comforter is our beacon and our guide. The Comforter shall "teach [us] all things."

When I look at it that way, I understand what Mary Baker Eddy meant when she wrote:

Truth's immortal idea is sweeping down the centuries, gathering beneath its wings the sick and sinning. My weary hope tries to realize that happy day, when man shall recognize the Science of Christ and love his neighbor as himself, — when he shall realize God's omnipotence and the healing power of the divine Love in what it has done and is doing for mankind. The promises will be fulfilled. The time for the reappearing of the divine healing is throughout all time; and whosoever layeth his earthly all on the altar of divine Science, drinketh of Christ's cup now, and is endued with the spirit and power of Christian healing.

In the words of St. John: "He shall give you another Comforter, that he may abide with you forever." This Comforter I understand to be Divine Science.

--Science and Health

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Jesus' prayer—we are one

I just finished reading the Gospel of John (which a group of us at church is reading through together—we'll meet to discuss it next week). It's such a powerful account of Jesus and his ministry, with a large section devoted to his words to us just prior to the crucifixion.

I especially love these verses from John 17, in the midst of his prayer for his disciples:

20 Neither pray I for these alone, but for them also which shall believe on me through their word;

21 That they all may be one; as thou, Father, art in me, and I in thee, that they also may be one in us: that the world may believe that thou hast sent me.

22 And the glory which thou gavest me I have given them; that they may be one, even as we are one:

23 I in them, and thou in me, that they may be made perfect in one; and that the world may know that thou hast sent me, and hast loved them, as thou hast loved me.

"[T]hat they may be one, even as we are one: I in them, and thou in me, that they may be made perfect in one…" I cannot read these words without a settled sense of peace washing over me. For I know that Jesus' prayer was [is] answered.

I feel so connected to that prayer, like he's talking right to my heart and telling me the truth of my being. I am one with Christ, with Love, with Truth. You and I are together in this oneness, forever held in the buoyancy of the Divine. All the world is in this oneness, united in peace and joy. Everyone throughout time has a place in this oneness, not one is left out, all are included.

We are one. This is how we can love all creation—in loving others, we are also loving ourselves and the Divine all at the same time. All creation exists within us because we are one with it. We have the capacity to understand it, to appreciate it, to express it. All of it. Because we are one in Spirit.

Ah, the peace this is bringing me this morning. I pray that you share it with me.

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Healing and medicine

A lot of people call me with questions about how Christian Science healing relates to medical practice, if at all.

Sometimes they've been given a very hard line from others when they've asked about it, meaning that these others have said that no medical intervention is to be tolerated at all.

I guess I don't really fall in that camp. My feeling is that while Mary Baker Eddy presented the ideal and the goal in her writings, she also clearly acknowledges the process of growth needed to achieve that ideal and goal. In other words, achieving 100% reliance on Spirit is a journey.

MBE even has occasional good things to say about using medical care. Here's one from her sermon Christian Healing:

Great caution should be exercised in the choice of physicians. If you employ a medical practitioner, be sure he is a learned man and skilful; never trust yourself in the hands of a quack. In proportion as a physician is enlightened and liberal is he equipped with Truth, and his efforts are salutary; ignorance and charlatanism are miserable medical aids. (p. 14)

Yes, she's cautioning us to find the right physician. But she's definitely not prohibiting the use of medical care—in fact, she even calls it "salutary," or beneficial, if the doctor is "enlightened." With today's increase in mind/body awareness amongst physicians, it is possible to find care that will coincide with or support a spiritual approach. I would consider this a step on the journey to total reliance on Spirit.

Here's some more food for thought from MBE's writings:

Until the advancing age admits the efficacy and supremacy of Mind, it is better for Christian Scientists to leave surgery and the adjustment of broken bones and dislocations to the fingers of a surgeon, while the mental healer confines himself chiefly to mental reconstruction and to the prevention of inflammation. Christian Science is always the most skilful surgeon, but surgery is the branch of its healing which will be last acknowledged. --Science and Health

Until people better understand spiritual healing, it is *better* to let surgeons do their job and for Christian Scientists to limit their work to the aftereffects. *Better.* In my mind, she's actually telling us not only to be sensible as to where we are on the learning curve, but also where everyone else is. It's better to be understandable to our fellow man than to be radical in some cases.

Duty to Patients. SECT. 23. If a member of this Church has a patient whom he does not heal, and whose case he cannot fully diagnose, he may consult with an M.D. on the anatomy involved. And it shall be the privilege of a Christian Scientist to confer with an M.D. on Ontology, or the Science of being. --Church Manual

We need to know what we're dealing with. We're supposed to be able to "fully diagnose," and if we can't, we might want to consider finding out what's going on with a particular physical condition. (I've found some Web tools, such as Web MD, helpful in this regard.) Perhaps the patient doesn't need to know the diagnosis (in that it might increase their fear), but it seems to me that this By-law from the Manual is saying the healer should be informed so prayerful treatment can be directed accordingly. Complete ignorance of the physical situation does not serve the patient.

I've also found it helpful in healing to at least find out what the patient thinks is going on. I mean, if they are thinking it, it may be important for me as their practitioner to be in on what's on their mind. So I will encourage people to tell me what they know or have been told, again so I can direct my prayerful treatment accordingly.

Emerge gently from matter into Spirit. Think not to thwart the spiritual ultimate of all things, but come naturally into Spirit through better health and morals and as the result of spiritual growth. --Science and Health

Take it a step at a time. Be patient. Don't rush things. It should all make sense to you as you grow. There should be a logical progression of increased trust in spiritual ideas and their reality. Day by day, each idea will add to the one before, and your gradual storehouse of conviction and understanding will allow greater demonstrations.

This road is very individual for both patient and practitioner—indeed, each situation needs to be looked at individually, even if it involves the same two people. I find it helpful to remember that God is Love, and spiritual healing therefore also includes kindness and patience. A drop of kindness will decrease fear much more quickly than strict adherence to a rule or standard.

So be kind to yourself on this journey, and you'll find yourself approaching the ideal naturally and safely.

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What happiness is made of

Wanted to end the week with this thought from Mary Baker Eddy:

Happiness consists in being and in doing good; only what God gives, and what we give ourselves and others through His tenure, confers happiness: conscious worth satisfies the hungry heart, and nothing else can. --Message for 1902, p. 17

That seems to say it all this morning! Have a great weekend.

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Mentoring with Mazie

Had a very inspiring evening last night with the Mazie Foundation. I'm a mentor-volunteer, so I went with my mentee to the ceremony where the kids stand up and talk about the goals they set months ago and how they achieved them.

The program is for promising but at-risk kids who just need a little non-professional encouragement to get themselves to the next level. Founded by a family whose son was killed tragically in a car accident, the Foundation has helped several hundred kids achieve academic and personal goals.

I like this quote from the Website: "No one makes it in America without some kind of mentor. Whenever successful people look back, they cite those older adults who influenced their development, even if they knew each other for only a short time." It shows what a difference one person can make.

I definitely could see the results last night at the ceremony. There were kids from all over the world: Dominican Republic, Haiti, Nigeria, the Ukraine. Each one came to this country with decided disadvantages and difficult family situations. Often they were leaving parents or other family behind to follow a dream to come to American, only to find that life here was just as hard as the one they left—and they had to learn English. But as each one stood and read the essays they'd written for their college application, I could see the strong spirit of each. They have lofty goals, including becoming surgeons, pediatricians or computer programmers. One girl wants to study AIDS so she can go back and help her country.

My mentee and I spent the evening cracking jokes to each other. She has a razor sharp sense of humor and is unfailingly cheery and positive, even though the circumstances of her background are harder than I can imagine enduring. She doesn't even mind the occasional hug. We've only known each other these few months, but as she hopped out of the car last night, she threw me a quick, "Love you!"

All this inspiration is happening right here in little Framingham. I'm thinking this morning of kids around the country, from the most crowded urban scene to the most bucolic rural area, displaced from the place of their birth, struggling to make sense of life here. I'm thinking of the kids who were born here, no less confused, yet full of the same promise and energy that just needs some channeling and guidance.

I've learned, too, that parents can't always get the job done. When the parent is in survival mode, there's not a lot left over to encourage or inspire their kids to higher achievement (although each of the kids last night thanked their parents effusively for their support and hard work).

So I'm praying for these kids today, that the Divine will lead them to the resources they need, that caring adults will take the time to stop, look, and listen—and see that one word of encouragement can go a long way. I pray that the resonance of giving and receiving will scoop up these kids in the cycle of good, blessing both them and the ones who took the moment to care.

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"Big" healings

What is required for "big" healings? How can we radically change the body for the better?

I've had some interesting conversations about this lately. What with the "law of attraction" and the contradictory evidence of the senses, it sometimes seems there's no definitive answer. Some people have questioned the hit-or-miss quality of spiritual healing, at least to outward appearance.

I maintain, however, that the scientific approach Mary Baker Eddy discovered can give reliable, consistent results. I think that sometimes what we need to understand is what we're up against.

I post this passage *not* to be discouraging, but to shed light on what is required:

The universal belief in physics weighs against the high and mighty truths of Christian metaphysics. This erroneous general belief, which sustains medicine and produces all medical results, works against Christian Science; and the percentage of power on the side of this Science must mightily outweigh the power of popular belief in order to heal a single case of disease. --Science and Health

This, to me, clarifies what many think is the problem with that law of attraction theory—that all we experience is the result of our own thinking. MBE is stating that the "erroneous general belief" might be the culprit in a case of disease, and that we need to throw a higher proportion of Truth in the mix to heal it.

Now, this might seem hopeless, and indeed it would be if we had to rely on our own human minds to accomplish this feat. My mind doesn't outweigh all the other minds involved. But by God's great mercy, we have the invincible force of divine Mind on the side of health and healing. The one omnipotent divine Mind brings the "percentage of power" necessary to vanquish "erroneous general belief"—we don't have to do it alone.

Aligning our thought with Mind takes both moment-by-moment focus and long-term commitment. To increase our healing power, we need to commit. Are we ready, every day, to deny the evidence of the senses and train our thought Spiritward? Are we ready to turn from the most disturbing and possibly initially unchanging outward appearances and instead accept only the good, the real, the permanent? Are we committed to the radical position that good is the only reality, no matter what shape discord is taking in our lives?

I'm speaking to myself, since today I am faced with a few things that seem unyielding, that seem like there's nothing humanly I can do about them. The situations are in the hands of others and not subject to my direct control. Yet they're disturbing to me and I need to see through them to the reality of harmony and health. I’m being challenged to do this even as the outward appearance remains unchanged.

That's the job at hand. That's the way to "big" healing. We’ve got to outweigh that "erroneous general belief." What is needed—and I've seen this work before—is unswerving faith and clear-eyed vision that what is harmful or useless has no place in reality, so therefore is on its way out even as we wrestle with it. That's the requirement. Are you with me?

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Christian Science and the Holy Spirit (the Comforter)

I found a very interesting explanation of Christian Science on the Web yesterday. It's about halfway down a page called "Christian Healing," edited by Robert Nguyen Cramer (now deceased), on the BibleTexts.com site (a site devoted to "exploring the original biblical texts, early Christian writings, and Christian values, practices, teachings, and history prior to 313 A.D.").

Mary Baker Eddy (Miscellaneous Writings [Mis] and Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures [S&H]). J. Kier Howard states, "There has always been in Christianity a healing ministry that has been seen as biblically based." Howard also refers to such ministry's conflict with modern science. Below are descriptions of a prime example of systematic efforts to responsibly establish -- in the modern scientifically oriented world -- what Howard describes as biblically literal healing ministry. Extended quotations below are provided in the attempt to provide a balanced and fair representation of Eddy's teachings, which often have been misrepresented and misunderstood by both opponents and proponents.

It should be noted that Eddy used relevant modern terms and analogies to enable today's readers to better understand and appreciate biblical teachings, just as did early Christian writers, such as Clement of Alexandria, Athenagorus, Theophilus, Tertullian, and Origen did in the second century A.D. For instance, when Eddy used the term divine Science or simply Science (with an uppercase S), she was referring to the biblical term, the Holy Spirit, which the Gospel of John also refers to as "the Spirit of truth" (John 14:17; 15:26; 16:13) and as "the Comforter" (John 14:16,26; 15:26; 16:7; variously translated as the Advocate, the Counselor, the Paraclete, the Defense Attorney). In light of this, a "Christian Scientist" may be considered to be anyone whose practice of Christianity and Christian healing includes following Christ in thinking, speaking, and acting as instructed and directed by the Holy Spirit, the Spirit of truth. In this sense being a Christian Scientist is a way of life and is in no way defined by or limited to any denominational affiliation. Thus, when reading Eddy's writings, one can understand the intended biblical concept by silently substituting the phrase "Holy Spirit" wherever one reads "Science" or "divine Science" -- or in many cases where one reads "Christian Science." In the same way wherever one reads, "Christian Scientist," one can silently substitute, "one who is a methodical disciple of Christ and guided by the Holy Spirit."

To me, this is a very refreshing take on Christian Science, and on being a Christian Scientist. What an open mind this gentleman must have, I wish I could have known him. He's given the traditional Bible student a lovely way to read MBE's works and get the most out of them without experiencing any theological disconnect.

I'm so grateful the Comforter is here, and that its explanation in Science and Health teaches us how to actively feel that presence.

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How to be happy—argue with yourself

Here's some to the point words from Mary Baker Eddy re: happiness, which I found in my study this weekend:

If you wish to be happy, argue with yourself on the side of happiness; take the side you wish to carry, and be careful not to talk on both sides, or to argue stronger for sorrow than for joy. You are the attorney for the case, and will win or lose according to your plea. --Christian Healing, p. 10

"Argue with yourself" about happiness. Interesting! It's not enough to simply want to be happy, to yearn for it. We've got to make the case for it.

Some arguments for the case:

• Do I deserve to be happy? Yes! I'm a child of the Divine, with every right to all the joy, fulfillment, energy and expression given to me at the moment of creation. Happiness has been given to me as a gift by God, and I don't have the power to obviate that gift.
• Can I be happy? Yes! As the direct expression of the Divine, I can let the flow of happiness surge right through me. It's not something I manufacture, but something I experience. It's like the sunlight, shining on all of us equally. I can stand in the sun, basking in it.
• Do I want to be happy? Yes! Happiness is my natural state, not something foreign or unusual. I embrace it eagerly, and accept its place in my life. I can do nothing to resist it—it is irresistible.
• Am I happy? Yes! I have all the blessing and inspiration ever created right at my fingertips. I am happy now.

And, lest you think arguing this way is selfish, consider this additional passage from MBE:

Happiness is spiritual, born of Truth and Love. It is unselfish; therefore it cannot exist alone, but requires all mankind to share it. --Science and Health

Once you've argued successfully for your own happiness, you will radiate it forth and share it with everyone around you. You owe it to yourself and to those close to you to be a beacon of happiness that shines non-stop.

Make the case for happiness today—you're sure to win.

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"I'm good."

One last installment on this goofy goodness cycle I'm experiencing this week: "I'm good."

I've adopted this turn of phrase wholeheartedly. I find it comes in handy at holiday parties or professional mixers, where kindly hosts urge decadent confections when you're doing your best to stay balanced. I can smile and say warmly, "I'm good, thanks," and then go on to praise how wonderful it all looks. I don't have to say the dreaded, "No, thank you" and sound like a party pooper, and I can be appreciative and positive.

It’s the positive side of the message I love. Stating your own goodness, meaning that you're happy and satisfied and glad to be there, has its own spiritual power. You're not denying yourself anything or turning down the person's offer. Rather, you're appreciating their kindness while being conscious of your own well being. They become conscious of it too and invariably smile back. I love the transaction.

It's basically another way of saying, "All is well." Dear Kate commented for me the other day by paraphrasing the Bible, "It is well with the child." Good is God, and God is good. When I say that, I don't mean that good is an attribute of God, but that God is good itself. Good is what God is made of—God is the substance of good. Good fills all space, is eternal and constant, has all power and works on the Principle of Love. And we are the image and likeness of that all-encompassing good.

When you claim and accept the status of good, you're that much closer to experiencing it. I'd go so far as to say that your statement of the presence and power of good can even be the turning point that brings you the harmony you seek.

So when I say this next, you'll know what I mean—

Have a good one!

See you next week.

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Freely ye have received, freely give

I haven't written about Dear Abby for a while, but today's just calls out for comment. (I read the column every day.)

It's about how to repay a kindness. For an uplift this morning, read the touching stories of how the recipients of generosity repay their benefactors by being generous in their turn to others. They are living examples of the Bible verse: "freely ye have received, freely give" (Matthew).

I love what this flow of goodness represents. I wrote some while ago about the economy of Love, and I'm still seeing it in action almost daily. It fits with what's turning out to be a theme for this week—people are good, and they express goodness most of the time.

We all think about our bank accounts and retirement accounts, etc. Have you ever thought about the other "account" you have with Love? This is an account established by Love itself, for you and for others. Love made the first deposit by creating you in its image, thereby giving you have an infinite, undepletable balance.

Those who have cared for you over the years expressed the nature of this infinite balance to you. When you give back, you are spending from that balance—but the balance never goes down. In fact, you experience more of the balance by participating in its flow.

I can compare it to a clean mountain stream, flowing merrily down to the sea. We can sit on the banks and watch the flow, enjoying its beauty but not getting wet. Or we can jump in and experience the flow, letting it take us on a journey to new vistas. Every now and then we might climb out and enjoy the new destination for a while, but the flow goes on, never ending, always positive. And we can always jump back in.

How are you experiencing the flow today? "Freely ye have received, freely give."

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It's all good

I love how all the comments on yesterday's post line up over there in the blog main page's right column, saying, "It's gonna be all right" over and over again. It was like getting reassuring pats on my back all day long. I also received some amazing supportive emails and even a few phone calls. Thank you, everybody.

You know how kids today say, "It's all good" all the time? Like when you have to change plans on them, or when you forgot to do something for them, or when a mutual friend disappoints. The kids will shrug and say, "It's all good."

I remember the first time a friend of my daughter's said that to me, I wanted to smack him. It made no sense to me in the context of what we were talking about and I thought he was blowing me off. Since then, I've heard it enough that I think I now get it. It means, "Don't worry about it, I'm sure everything's happening the way it's supposed to." In other words, they're expecting good.

My sister and I have been talking in detail about the law of attraction (as described in The Secret). She reminded me that what I think governs my experience. If I'm worried or anxious, that's what I'll feel. I can instead embrace and intentionally pursue peace, joy, harmony, expectancy of good. I can expect good.

She and I also discussed how each day is new. The past has no power unless we decide to drag it forward into today. By approaching each day as new, we have a clean slate and can put anything on it that we want.

Today I choose to expect good. I believe there is a divine omnipotent Source that gives only good, so I'm aligning myself with that Source in expecting it.

It's all good. And if you comment today, you'll give me a nice long list of that sentiment in the right hand column!

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It's gonna be all right

Last night, I talked with my 15-year-old son who is away at school. I called him late, so I was already tired. He'd had a rough couple of days himself. So the conversation started out rocky.

We talked about a bunch of issues we're facing and I was getting kind of depressed, so finally I said, "Just tell me everything's going to be all right."

So he said, "Everything's going to be all right, Mom." His saying it actually did make me feel better.

That moment made me realize something. I'm not sure how to articulate it, but I think maybe it's time now for me to listen to the man in him. To pull away from seeing him as a child who needs me to take care of things for him; to instead see him as holding the reins of his own future.

This has been foundationally part of our relationship since the get go—I just wrote about it last week. Now for the first time though, for me it's becoming less hypothetical and more actual fact.

Do I believe he's a man in his own right? Can I put a lid on my own interfering and let him find his own way? Will this ultimately be the support he needs to do it himself?

I hope the answer to all those questions is "yes." I feel my heart flutter at the prospect, though. Do I trust enough?

And I'm realizing now as I'm writing that it's not my son I have to trust. I have to trust his Father, with a capital "F." His Father, God, is right there with him. It's this Father who will guide him and discipline him and mentor him and inspire him.

I can't do the Father's job. My mothering with a small "m" perhaps has served its purpose. Now I need to transition out of the driver's seat. Which is funny, because one of the things my son asked me about last night was when could he get his driver's permit.

So it's a bittersweet morning here at the Matthews house. But it's a bright and sunny and crisp day, and I know everything's going to be all right. My son told me so.

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(Good is not...) Stranger than Fiction

Watched a fun film last night: Stranger than Fiction, with a truly awesome cast, familiar faces popping up all over it. Great to see Linda Hunt again, and Tim Hulce, and Tony Hale. The leading cast unexpectedly worked—funny man Will Farrell in a contemplative role, holding his own with acting giants Emma Thompson and Dustin Hoffman, and even Queen Latifah. Maggie Gyllenhaal radiated as the love interest as well. Nicely done.

Without revealing too much plot, suffice it to say it ends up being about a person walking open-eyed into his fate, but willing to sacrifice for the good of another. He's the Everyman, but through this movie you can see how important the Everyman is. (And to all my writer friends, this movie is a must-see.)

I went away feeling that we're all important. Each of us, every day, has the power to improve the world around us. From patience at the post office, courtesy while driving and showing up to meetings on time, to a kind word for someone who's upset, shoveling snow for a neighbor, and volunteering at the food bank, these little things turn out to be big things. They add up.

I remain convinced that 99.9% of what goes on in this world is good. My friend Mario used to say that the only reason the news is full of bad stuff is because it's *news.* Meaning, it's unusual enough to get airtime. All the good that goes on—that's not news because it's essentially ongoing and constant.

Good can resonate and reverberate, too, like the ripples on a pond. If I'm good to you, and you take that good feeling and are good to someone else, and so on and so on, we've launched a chain reaction that is more powerful than nuclear fission or carbon emissions.

It's powerful because good has its source in the Divine, who is all good and all-power. That's why we gain strength of purpose from doing good, like Will Farrell's character in the film. We know instinctively that goodness strengthens us, even if it's sometimes harder to do. We're willing to do good when the opportunity arises because we know it strengthens the whole.

Those are my musings for today…. Have a good Monday!

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Overnight healing—a positive approach to prayer

Healing for me often comes when I change my internal dialog. What am I telling myself, and consequently, what is filling my thinking? I've seen that what I think has an impact on what I experience.

Yesterday I felt the symptoms of a cold start up. A little scratch here, a runny nose there, and some explosive sneezes at my writer's group (and lots of "bless you!"s). I was concerned that this was the third night this week I'd been out, and I have another planned with a girlfriend tonight. Also, this morning is my networking meeting, where I’m president, so I have to be there bright and early to run the show.

I went to bed with all this on my mind. Sure enough, around 1am, I woke up with all the uncomfortable symptoms in full swing. I tossed and turned for a long while, trying this and that, but not being able to sleep. Finally the idea came that I could, after all, pray about this. Funny how it takes so long to figure that out! I thought, Right! I can pray!

So I started in what I might call my usual way—I do not have a cold, I am not having a hard time sleeping, because God is with me, etc. Then I stopped myself. Why was I spending all this effort focused on the negatives? Because even if you're negativing the negatives, that's still a lot of negativity.

I changed my internal dialog. I am healthy, I am rested, all is well, God is with me. I embraced health rather than denying sickness. I acknowledged resting in God's love rather than ruminating over the lost sleep. I made my thinking 100% positive.

This had the effect of cheering me up instantly, and lessening my worry. I was smiling as I drifted back off to sleep. When the alarm went off at 5am, I luxuriated in the sensation of freedom from the cold—it had lapsed away to almost nothing, and one authoritative nose-blow took care of that.

A positive approach is a powerful tool, I recommend it.

So, it's off to the meeting! Have a great weekend, everybody.

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The Long Tail

Just finished another life-changing book—The Long Tail by Chris Anderson.

I guess you'd have to call it an economics book, but to me it was also anthropological, philosophical, a study of the Internet and communications, and an examination of the power of choice. Because of the Internet, we have so much more power as individuals than we've ever had before. The profound change this has wrought (or wreaked, if you think havoc has ensued) throughout society is already pervasive and irreversible—and it kind of snuck up on us, didn't it?

Here are some excerpts. And, because this is an blog centered on spirituality, try to read these with that in mind. I think all these passages have implications for spiritual movements as well as economic markets.

For a generation of customers used to doing their buying research via search engine, a company's brand is not what the company says it is, but what Google says it is. The new tastemasters are us. Word of mouth is now a public conversation, carried in blog comments and customer reviews, exhaustively collated and measured. The ants have megaphones.

Google doesn't try to force things to happen their way. They try to figure out what's going to happen, and arrange to be standing there when it does.

One person's "good" could easily be another's "bad"; indeed it almost always is. … If a producer intends something to be absolutely right for one audience, it will, by definition, be wrong for another. The compromises necessary to make something appeal to everyone mean it will almost certainly not appeal to anyone—that's why they call it the lowest common denominator.

Broadly, the Long Tail is about abundance. Abundant shelf space, abundant distribution, abundant choice. How awkward, then, that one of the definitions of economics given by Wikipedia is: "the social science of choice under scarcity." … It's hard to overstate how fundamental to economics the notion is that you can't have it all for free—the entire discipline is oriented around studying trade-offs and how they're made. … Abundance, like growth itself, is a force that is changing our world in ways that we experience every day, whether we have an equation to describe it or not.

Fundamentally, a society that asks questions and has the power to answer them is a healthier society than one that simply accepts what it's told from a narrow range of experts and institutions. … Although the decline of mainstream cultural institutions may result in some people turning to echo chambers of like-minded views, I suspect that over time the power of human curiosity combined with near-infinite access to information will tend to make most people more open-minded, not less.

I love these conclusions! Ants having megaphones, niche markets, abundance, open-mindedness. The world has changed in so many remarkable ways. How can these trends not have spiritual implications as well?

Or perhaps in fact these developments are an indication of spiritual growth that has already occurred. Now, that's a concept.

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