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Saturday, April 29, 2006

A word about redesign

You've heard that phrase, "Today is the first day of the rest of your life"? That's what today feels like to me!

As many of you know, my prior blog design was eaten. Consequently, I had to rebuild it, which could have been a chore but allowed me instead to learn more about design and coding than I ever thought possible.
  • Thank you to blog reader Lesley who had a printout of my right navigation links--now I'll always know to back up my blog just in case.
  • Thank you to my honest and supportive Mom who told me quite frankly that my temporary placeholder design (the one with the lighthouse) didn't reflect how peppy I am.
  • Thank you to my brilliant designer daughter who IMed with me way past my bedtime to get all the colors and shapes just right.
I hope you like the new look. Let me know what you think!


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Friday, April 28, 2006

Wholesome chastisements

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These passages from this week’s Bible Lesson have been food for thought:

My son, despise not the chastening of the Lord; neither be weary of his correction: For whom the Lord loveth he correcteth; even as a father the son in whom he delighteth.

--Proverbs

Through the wholesome chastisements of Love, we are helped onward in the march towards righteousness, peace, and purity, which are the landmarks of Science.

--Science and Health

In doing a little independent study, I came across this note I’d written in the margins of one of Mary Baker Eddy’s books years ago:

What feels like chastisement is the forcible rejection of evil by perfection.

Nobody likes that feeling, but the process is inevitable. Our own perfection requires that any evil we’re accepting be displaced. Forcibly. And sometimes not on our own timetable. Ha—if we waited until we *wanted* to get better, we never would!

Yet still, I find this comforting. Even the experience of feeling chastised can tell us that we are inextricably linked to the divine Father-Mother. Having the capacity to grow and change is an outgrowth of that connection. Without being linked to the Divine through the tender love of the Christ, we would never improve. Improvement itself is an indication of our eternal connection.

But of course, improvement starts with self-knowledge, with the uncovering of that which needs improvement. Not always fun. On that score, this week in particular ranks very low on the fun-meter for me, because I’ve made some uncomfortable discoveries in areas where I need a fundamental shift in thinking.

I guess I’m grateful to know this now even though the mental and spiritual work ahead seems daunting. And I would fight it if I weren’t convinced already that “resistance is futile” (in Star Trek parlance) when it comes to spiritual growth. So I may as well get it over with, right? Which means today, getting down to it as much as I can. “[T]he the human self must be evangelized. This task God demands us to accept lovingly to-day, and to abandon so fast as practical the material, and to work out the spiritual which determines the outward and actual” (Science and Health).

So here I go! It should be an interesting weekend.


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Thursday, April 27, 2006

You are worthy

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As we rang off on the phone last night, my best friend said to me, “When we hang up, I want you to say to yourself, ‘I am worthy, I am worthy, I am worthy.’” This made me laugh, of course, and of course I promptly forgot to do it. But it came to mind in my early morning prayers today.

Am I worthy? How do I know? And worthy of what?

To me there’s only one way to get an answer for these questions. I have to start with perfect God, holy Spirit, infinite Creator. Because to start with my human self would be a travesty. No way is the human selfhood I’m slogging around worthy of much of anything. It makes too many mistakes; it has too many fears. And I probably spend too much time beating it up and expecting it to be perfect. Not gonna happen.

But then there’s God. I’m so relieved to remember the divine Being who fills all space actually made me in its image and likeness. In the system I study, Christian Science, God creates out of His own selfhood, with the same substance as Himself. He is His own raw material, because He is total self-existence. Nothing exists outside of God, Spirit, from which anything else could be made.

So there wasn’t some flawed pile of dirt God was working with to create me. Instead, I am a being of His light, created with His glory. This selfhood, this reality, is eternally worthy of all praise and admiration because it is in His likeness. How else could it possibly be?

To me, remembering my own worthiness is a form of worshipping God. If I forget, if I slip into hating myself or deriding myself, I’m in effect turning my back on God and His creation. If I believe too much in the mortal selfhood and forget there’s more to me than meets the eye, I’ve forgotten God as well. And boy, that feeling is miserable.

The things I get into such a stew about, the randomness and unpredictability of life, the way even my best intentions can get skewed and turn out a mess—these things have always been and continue to be the smokescreen. This is not to say I shouldn’t try to be the best person I can be. But I have to remember that even my human best doesn’t hold a candle to the streaming light of God’s creation.

Sometimes I just have to retreat, in self-defense, as Jesus did, when he got away from the clamoring crowds and took the time to pray. Mary Baker Eddy says about these times, “Jesus prayed; he withdrew from the material senses to refresh his heart with brighter, with spiritual views” (Science and Health).

When my heart needs refreshment, when I pull away from the material drama, I find in the heart of prayer a brighter view and a renewed sense of my own worthiness. And really, it’s the only place I’m going to find it.


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Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Today is Forgiveness Day

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Okay, so I’m declaring a personal holiday. The reason I know I need to think about forgiveness is that I’m going to court this morning as plaintiff in a civil suit. I genuinely want to arrive at an equitable and fair solution, yet I also feel these emotions of tension and hurt. Forgiveness is the only way I know to let those things go.

I wrote a series on forgiveness after attending the Harvard Medical School conference on the same subject several years ago (you can find it on my articles page if you like). The two concepts that have stuck with me since then are:

  1. Forgiveness is not about excusing the other, but about releasing resentment. This helps you more than anyone else, because resentment eats away at you and doesn’t affect the other person at all.
  2. Empathy is a way to find forgiveness. Meaning, trying to understand why the person did what they did helps let go of resentment. Again, not to excuse or condone. But to achieve peace of mind for yourself.

Thankfully, you don’t even have to discuss this with the other party. But what you are doing is adopting a frame of mind that ensures fairness. If you can get over your resentment, you are much more likely to be able to formulate a fair and equitable solution. If you’re mad, though, you just want revenge.

A couple years after my husband and I split up, we reached an impasse. We still shared a daughter, so it was important for us to continue with a relationship of some sort, but we couldn’t get beyond the hurt. At first we were angry with each other, but gradually we both began to feel bad about all the pain we’d caused each other.

Finally one day, we were just sobbing in each other’s arms saying we were sorry. It makes me shake my head, remembering now… we were so young and just stupid. And remembering the pain and continuing to blame ourselves wasn’t making it go away. We were just wallowing in it.

So these words popped into my head: “Let’s just assume forgiveness from now on.” Meaning, from that point forward, when we remembered anything about what we’d done to each other, we’d assume the other had forgiven us.

Boy, did that feel good. To see each other as free from resentment allowed each of us to come to terms with what we’d done in our own ways. He’s now like a brother to me, although we don’t see each other much.

I think the spiritual basis of this is, injury is just one more lie connected with this mortal seeming. In spiritual fact, we can never be injured. No one can hurt us; no one wants to hurt us. We exist in the harmony of Spirit. This is the Truth of being.

So today I walk a fine line. Even while taking appropriate human action, I need to remember always that I’ve never been injured. I’ll let you know how it goes.


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Tuesday, April 25, 2006

When kismet strikes

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All right! It now seems that all my technical difficulties have been solved, so I’m back to being able to post and to sending out my daily email from my Web hosting service. So, on to the spiritual stuff.

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You know that feeling when a particular passage or phrase suddenly seems to have added meaning that directly applies to your situation? When that happens to me, I’ve been prone to giving it kind of magical attributes—like, ooo, aah, God sent me just the right message today. It’s kismet, it’s serendipity, it’s coincidence, but it’s divine. Now, however, I’m starting to suspect that something else is going on.

Yesterday I had a wide diversity of issues to pray about, ranging from personal family situations to calls for help from around the country on many different topics. As I opened my thought to how to begin my treatments in a systematic fashion, I was drawn to this passage:

When the illusion of sickness or sin tempts you, cling steadfastly to God and His idea. Allow nothing but His likeness to abide in your thought. Let neither fear nor doubt overshadow your clear sense and calm trust, that the recognition of life harmonious — as Life eternally is — can destroy any painful sense of, or belief in, that which Life is not. Let Christian Science, instead of corporeal sense, support your understanding of being, and this understanding will supplant error with Truth, replace mortality with immortality, and silence discord with harmony.

--Science and Health

It was the phrase “clear sense and calm trust” that came to mind, so I went to the complete passage to see what else was there. This passage became my prayer for the day. And it fit every situation. I gained huge inspiration from going over that passage methodically for every individual I was treating. Each time fresh insights came through. It never felt like I was going over the same ground, but rather I was feeling increased resonance with the ideas.

Was this magic? Did God send me an idea to find just the right passage that had specific applicability to every circumstance? I don’t think so. What I think now is that by opening my thought to embrace this passage with new eyes, universal Truth took over.

Truth is just true. When we get an inkling of it, it breaks through on a conscious level and we experience inspiration. But Truth has always been there, strong, resolute, undeniable. Truth is the source of the inspiration, not the coincidental words or phases. It’s our engagement with the ideas that energizes our prayer.

Look for the Truth in your life today. It’s everywhere!


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Monday, April 24, 2006

Blog Fest -- one year old today!

I can hardly believe I’ve been writing for this blog for an entire year! And ironic that today of all days, Blogger decides to have a glitch or two. My mom even called to find out if I was okay. :) Thanks Mom!

This past year has been incredible. It’s been a time of great spiritual growth--I've learned so much. Here's what I've learned about you, my readers:
  • My readers are amazing. I’ve made new friends from all around the globe.
  • My readers are open-minded. You guys are ready to consider any idea.
  • My readers are inquisitive, asking questions and probing further.
  • My readers are insightful. I’ve learned so much from all of you.
  • My readers are loving, even offering encouragement when I need it. Thank you!

So here’s to a second year of great growth and companionship. You’ve been here for me—remember I’m always here for you.

Here are some dohickies in celebration of my one-year birthday. If you’d like to explore, please do!

First, and inevitably, a request for feedback. Follow the link to answer eight short questions about this blog.

Second, check out this page of ideas on how you can support the blog further. I’m always hoping to reach more readers, and you know best who else might be interested.

Third, I’d love to see your flag on Frappr, the map of my site users. If you’re not in there already, please add yourself! Or, if you can’t figure it out, email me with your name and location, and I’ll add you myself.

Much love, and thanks to all!

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Friday, April 21, 2006

Support the blog

Hello!

Some folks are enjoying this blog regularly, and have inquired about ways to support it.
  1. First: tell your friends! If a posting has inspired you, please feel free to use the envelope icon just below the posting to send it to friends or family.

  2. Second: participate! Be sure to add your comments and inspiration as you read, using the comments button below each posting. Everyone would love to share in your thoughts, and this way spiritual ideas spread -- and change the world. You can also add a flag to the Frappr map so people can see where you're from.

  3. Third: subscribe! Use this link (also in the upper right column) to receive daily updates from the blog, so you'll never miss an entry. Or, set up a Bloglines RSS feed to be notified whenever there's a new post.

  4. Fourth: link! If you have your own blog or Website and you read something here that you like, please tell your readers about it with a link.

  5. Fifth: donate! Laura welcomes your contributions if you're inclined that way. Your donations will help support the pro bono prayer work Laura does for site visitors who are unable to pay for healing treatment. You can use the button below to make a secure donation through PayPal.

through PayPal


If you'd like other options for
donating, please Contact Laura.


Thank you so much for your support, both prayerful and practical.


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Instruments of Love

Here’s something I’ve been wanting to share for a few weeks: Real Life ‘Crash’ in LA. It’s a great story from a CNN correspondent about the perpetrator and the victim of a long-ago crime meeting and becoming friends. (The “crash” reference is to the new movie, Crash, which won the Best Film Academy Award this year.)

And today I’d like to say a few words about friendship.

Somewhere along the way as a life-long Christian Scientist, I’d gotten the impression that I was supposed to “go it alone.” Meaning, when I had problems to face, I needed to work it out privately with God, and not rely on human support. Also, I avoided learning whether my fellow beings were in trouble, assuming the best thing was for them to work it out themselves as well. It became sort of a badge of honor that I was strong enough to handle everything myself, and I didn’t get entangled in other people’s lives.

But it was lonely.

I’ve changed a great deal from this stance in recent years. Here and there along the way, as I grew closer to God, I could see that now and then He was actually sending other people to be a comfort to me. It wasn’t often the same person, and I didn’t get that one special person to have in my life permanently, but too frequently to discount there were times when I needed help and the help appeared in the form of the loving acts of a friend.

So I began to keep my own radar on, to be at the ready to give a word of encouragement or a helping hand when needed. I began to notice more when others were sending the signal that something was on their minds. I began to voice the positive things that came to me where I might have kept silent before. I’ve also become more open about when I need help. This hasn’t scared away my friends like I thought it would—instead, they too are more than willing to be the instruments of Love in my life as I’ve been for them.

There is a symphony of Love being orchestrated by Spirit every moment. And we are the instruments on which Love is playing. It’s a song that fills every nook and cranny of human loneliness with divine comfort. Who needs to hear that song today? Let the melody flow through you today.

Check out A Friend in need as well for something I wrote a while back.


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Thursday, April 20, 2006

Grace and gratitude

Laura,

If you don't mind me asking, last week there was a word that kept coming up throughout my study and I have never really understood what it means in the Bible—"Grace." My only interpretation of that word can be defined as "not clumsy" or "a beautiful dancer." What is your understanding of its Bible meaning??

Brittany

Brittany,

I love your question about Grace. You're right, the Bible writers had a different meaning in mind. I've heard it described as "undeserved blessing." Meaning, even when we don't deserve it, we are blessed by God and goodness rains down on us. It's a deeply Christian concept, tied to the teaching that Jesus died for our sins, which is the ultimate expression of grace. That he willingly sacrificed so that we would gain freedom from sin, disease and death.

Laura

I’ve been thinking more about Brittany’s question since that email exchange. I found a strong general definition of grace on Answers.com. And I looked through all the Bible references that include the word grace.

There’s a lot in the Hebrew Testament about finding “grace in thy sight,” either from God or from a person. It’s like Definition 5 from Answers.com: “A favor rendered by one who need not do so; indulgence.”

Definition 8 elaborates on this sense of favor with these meanings:

  1. Divine love and protection bestowed freely on people.
  2. The state of being protected or sanctified by the favor of God.
  3. An excellence or power granted by God.

When someone does you a favor, not as a quid pro quo but because they love you or even just because they’re a nice person and may not even know you, that’s grace. The driver who lets you into the lane on the highway—that’s grace. The neighbor who tells you when your garage door is open. The police officer who patrols your street. The lawmaker who strives to look out for your best interests. The search-and-rescue professionals ready to risk their lives to save you if you get lost. All this is grace in practice.

These are a reflection of divine grace, that constant flow of good that comes to us from the Divine, which we can never fully deserve in this mortal state but which is ours by birthright as creations of the Divine.

I think grace is essential. It’s a fundamental part of our connection to Spirit that characterizes the relationship. It’s not just because God is all good and therefore must impart never-ending grace, although this is true. It’s also because without grace, there would be no gratitude.

Think about it. If every iota of good in our lives had to be earned and deserved, we’d never feel any gratitude. It’s the moments of surprise, the sense of being given a gift, that makes the gratitude well up in our hearts. God’s gift to us, constant grace, makes us aware of His presence because we know we haven’t done anything to evoke it. It’s just there, and we are awed and grateful.

Some more thoughts on grace, from the Bible and Science and Health:

For the law was given by Moses, but grace and truth came by Jesus Christ.

--John 1:17

Grace and Truth are potent beyond all other means and methods.

--67:23

For as by one man's disobedience many were made sinners, so by the obedience of one shall many be made righteous. Moreover the law entered, that the offence might abound. But where sin abounded, grace did much more abound: That as sin hath reigned unto death, even so might grace reign through righteousness unto eternal life by Jesus Christ our Lord.

--5:19-21

For sin shall not have dominion over you: for ye are not under the law, but under grace.

--Rom 6:14

The miracle of grace is no miracle to Love.

--494:15 (only)


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Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Mind the gaps

Do you ever feel like you’re under spiritual assault? When the stuff that’s coming at you seems to be directly targeting your weakest points? How does this happen? My friend Chris gave me some clarity on this point yesterday that I wanted to share.

I think I had been giving the “assaulter” too much credit. Meaning, it seemed like there was some sort of intelligent being out there who was discerning my weaknesses and exploiting them.

In Christian Science, Mary Baker Eddy coined a term for this assaulter—mortal mind. But she makes it clear that this so-called mind has no intelligence. God, Mind, is omni-intelligent, so the false mortal mind truly has no discernment at all. So how does it always seem to know where my weak points are?

Chris shared an analogy that gave me the answer. She likened the situation to a dam that walls water off from flooding a town. Think of the water as fear, the dam as spiritual understanding, and the town as your consciousness. If there are chinks in the dam—the proverbial "hole in the dike"—the water just seeps through at that point. The water has no intelligence, it’s just there on the other side of the wall. It doesn’t choose where to seep through. It’s the hole in the wall that lets it in.

Somehow this comforted me yesterday. I’m not fighting an enemy that’s out to get me personally. I’m simply fighting mindless fear that gets in at the places where I haven’t cemented my wall of spiritual understanding yet. In actuality, that fear is doing me a favor, because it’s highlighting the chinks in the wall for me to pinpoint with focused spiritual effort. I can scaffold up to the exact right point and fill in the gaps with the mortar of Truth (and be sure to consider both meanings of “mortar”—I can hear you groaning at the extended metaphor already).

So, with a special nod to my London readers, it’s clear we need to mind the gaps.

Here’s an inspiring page about the hole in the dike story, I encourage you to check it out.



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Tuesday, April 18, 2006

What gives life meaning

Have you ever felt that life has no meaning? Sometimes I’ve felt this way when situations have disappointed me or when things haven’t turned out the way I planned. I think, Well, that was a waste of time, or What was the point of all that?

Is there any point to just doing good, even when there’s no visible result or reward? I know I’m not the first person who suspects sometimes that the goodness I’m expressing might just be going into a black hole. But two passages from Science and Health are helping me understand how even this inevitably results in spiritual growth:

While we adore Jesus, and the heart overflows with gratitude for what he did for mortals, — treading alone his loving pathway up to the throne of glory, in speechless agony exploring the way for us, — yet Jesus spares us not one individual experience, if we follow his commands faithfully; and all have the cup of sorrowful effort to drink in proportion to their demonstration of his love, till all are redeemed through divine Love.

--26:1

If you launch your bark upon the ever-agitated but healthful waters of truth, you will encounter storms. Your good will be evil spoken of. This is the cross. Take it up and bear it, for through it you win and wear the crown. Pilgrim on earth, thy home is heaven; stranger, thou art the guest of God.

--254:27

The cup of sorrowful effort in proportion to the demonstration of Jesus’ love. Taking up the cross in order to win the crown.

This poem by Mary Baker Eddy speaks of kissing the cross, which to me has always meant to embrace it and see where it leads you.

CHRIST MY REFUGE

O'er waiting harpstrings of the mind
There sweeps a strain,
Low, sad, and sweet, whose measures bind
The power of pain,

And wake a white-winged angel throng
Of thoughts, illumed
By faith, and breathed in raptured song,
With love perfumed.

Then His unveiled, sweet mercies show
Life's burdens light.
I kiss the cross, and wake to know
A world more bright.

And o'er earth's troubled, angry sea
I see Christ walk,
And come to me, and tenderly,
Divinely talk.

Thus Truth engrounds me on the rock,
Upon Life's shore,
'Gainst which the winds and waves can shock,
Oh, nevermore!

From tired joy and grief afar,
And nearer Thee, —
Father, where Thine own children are,
I love to be.

My prayer, some daily good to do
To Thine, for Thee;
An offering pure of Love, whereto
God leadeth me.

I see, too, that the poem resolves to the very thing I’ve been thinking: the meaning of life is to serve others. The answer to the cross is to find “some daily good to do to Thine, for Thee.”

Today may feel like the cross, yet even in the swirl of suffering and doubt, the capacity remains to bless another, to do good, to serve. Life’s meaning comes not from avoiding the cross, but from how we respond to it.


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Monday, April 17, 2006

The prayer study

Someone asked me last week:

Laura, got any helpful thoughts about that recent study that purports to "prove" that prayer doesn't help heal?
I’ve seen a lot about this study on the various Yahoo! groups I belong to, and people are going round and round about it. What I think, though, as some others have concluded, is if you’re lumping Christian Science treatment into the study’s “prayer” category, it’s comparing apples to oranges.

I can’t speak much to the study itself, not having delved into its methodology or conclusions. There have been various studies of this type throughout my lifetime, and there will probably be more.

The thing is, I’ve never come up with a way myself that could accurately measure the effectiveness of Christian Science treatment. Each case is a unique situation. One case of fever, for instance, could be so unlike another case of fever in the aspects that prayer treats that comparing them would be impossible. Medical science wants to test results on the basis of similar physical conditions. But to really test results for spiritual healing, it would have to be about similar *mental* conditions.

And how do you know what those mental conditions are, actually, until you’ve unlocked what needs adjusting and it’s healed? You can’t know it ahead of time (so you can’t test for it) because treatment to me is often about helping the patient discover the mental condition that needs healing. And once you’ve figured that out, the case is almost done. "Christian Science never healed a patient without proving with mathematical certainty that error, when found out, is two-thirds destroyed, and the remaining third kills itself" (Mary Baker Eddy, Miscellaneous Writings p. 210).

So that’s why when the test states that it took a hundred heart patients, or a hundred ulcer patients, or whatever sub-group they come up with, and then tried to test prayer’s effectiveness, it sounds like nonsense to me. How do we know what each of those people need to learn spiritually? How do we know what the next step on their spiritual journey needs to be for them to experience healing?

And of course, there’s the added wrinkle that they often try to test in a double-blind way, meaning some of the patients themselves do not know they’re being prayed for. This of course to me seems unethical, because I do believe prayerful treatment can have a powerful effect and it’s wrong to impose that effect on people without their knowledge.

I have wondered, though, how I would pray if I were one of the assigned pray-ers. Christian Science treatment would include the understanding that the particular condition is not real for any child of God, is not God’s will for them, and that each and every one of us can feel the healing power of a connection with Spirit. And I would pray that whatever the person needs to learn will be revealed to them, and they will be willing to learn it. That this prayerful treatment will not just improve them physically, but also morally and spiritually.

But in the end, it’s not a fair test. Best results come from one-to-one interaction and divine Mind’s discernment of what needs treating. And I tell ya, it’s never a stomach or a heart. The patient is always consciousness.

Next time, I hope they test that.

Read Kim Korinek's thoughts on this issue, too.


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Friday, April 14, 2006

Good Friday / He is Risen

Today the weekend begins with the anniversary of Jesus’ crucifixion. I’d like to share an article I wrote some time ago, at the opening of the movie “The Passion of the Christ”: My moment of grace at The Passion. (It’s a PDF page, and may take a few moments to open.) I still think it’s a great movie, and I’m renting it soon to watch with my son.

Also, this page on my Website has some other PDF articles of mine from days gone past, feel free to browse.

With all the emphasis today on the crucifixion though, I’d also like to weigh in on the wondrous glory of Easter. To me, some of the greatest words in the English language are “He is Risen.” (Here’s an entry from last May about it.) I love sharing this greeting with those for whom it resonates. It’s such a glorious fact: the Master overcame death by resurrection.

Some thoughts from Science and Health:

What a contrast between our Lord's last supper and his last spiritual breakfast with his disciples in the bright morning hours at the joyful meeting on the shore of the Galilean Sea! His gloom had passed into glory, and his disciples' grief into repentance, — hearts chastened and pride rebuked. Convinced of the fruitlessness of their toil in the dark and wakened by their Master's voice, they changed their methods, turned away from material things, and cast their net on the right side. Discerning Christ, Truth, anew on the shore of time, they were enabled to rise somewhat from mortal sensuousness, or the burial of mind in matter, into newness of life as Spirit.

This spiritual meeting with our Lord in the dawn of a new light is the morning meal which Christian Scientists commemorate. They bow before Christ, Truth, to receive more of his reappearing and silently to commune with the divine Principle, Love. They celebrate their Lord's victory over death, his probation in the flesh after death, its exemplification of human probation, and his spiritual and final ascension above matter, or the flesh, when he rose out of material sight.

--34:29-18

So when I think about the last supper, the betrayal, the trial, the crucifixion, the death, I think also with expectancy of glory, resurrection, a stone rolled away, the morning meal, and eternal Life. It all has meaning.

Happy Good Friday—He is Risen.

p.s. Kim's blog entry today is great, too!


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Thursday, April 13, 2006

Exuberance

“We are all worms. But I do believe I am a glow-worm.”

--Churchill on Churchill

Ha! Found this quote in an attachment to a blog entry by Tom Peters on Exuberance. Apparently there’s a new book out: Exuberance: The Passion for Life by Kay Redfield Jamison.

Here’s some thoughts on the book from John Harrison on Amazon:

If you have read Dr. Jamison before you expect penetrating insights, but even though I have read all of her general works I was unprepared for the beauty of expression, both hers and of many quotations both shrewd and charming that adorn the text and advance her thought.

One of each: "Joy lacks the gravitas that suffering so effortlessly commands." Jamison at [page] 5; "The Greeks understood the mysterious power of the hidden side of things. They bequeathed to us one of the most beautiful words in our language - the word ‘enthusiasm’—en theos—a god within. The grandeur of human actions is measured by the inspiration from which they spring. Happy is he who hears a god within, and who obeys it." Louis Pasteur, same page. It is rare indeed to be reading a serious work and find yourself saying, "Wow."

Wow indeed. I’m inspired just by reading the review.

Enthusiasm and exuberance are apparently contagious. People who embody these qualities *act.* They don’t just sit quietly, they *move.* Consequently, others can catch the spirit.

I’ve never really thought of exuberance as a spiritual quality before. But there’s plenty of it in the Bible. Here’s a quick search on the word “leap”:

II Sam 6:16

And as the ark of the Lord came into the city of David, Michal Saul's daughter looked through a window, and saw king David leaping and dancing before the Lord;

Ps 18:28 thou,29

thou wilt light my candle: the Lord my God will enlighten my darkness. For by thee I have run through a troop; and by my God have I leaped over a wall.

Song 2:8

The voice of my beloved! behold, he cometh leaping upon the mountains, skipping upon the hills.

Isa 35:6

Then shall the lame man leap as an hart, and the tongue of the dumb sing: for in the wilderness shall waters break out, and streams in the desert.

Luke 1:41

And it came to pass, that, when Elisabeth heard the salutation of Mary, the babe leaped in her womb; and Elisabeth was filled with the Holy Ghost:

Luke 6:20-23

And he lifted up his eyes on his disciples, and said, Blessed be ye poor: for yours is the kingdom of God. Blessed are ye that hunger now: for ye shall be filled. Blessed are ye that weep now: for ye shall laugh. Blessed are ye, when men shall hate you, and when they shall separate you from their company, and shall reproach you, and cast out your name as evil, for the Son of man's sake. Rejoice ye in that day, and leap for joy: for, behold, your reward is great in heaven:

Acts 3:1-8

Now Peter and John went up together into the temple at the hour of prayer, being the ninth hour. And a certain man lame from his mother's womb was carried, whom they laid daily at the gate of the temple which is called Beautiful, to ask alms of them that entered into the temple; Who seeing Peter and John about to go into the temple asked an alms. And Peter, fastening his eyes upon him with John, said, Look on us. And he gave heed unto them, expecting to receive something of them. Then Peter said, Silver and gold have I none; but such as I have give I thee: In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth rise up and walk. And he took him by the right hand, and lifted him up: and immediately his feet and ankle bones received strength. And he leaping up stood, and walked, and entered with them into the temple, walking, and leaping, and praising God.

We love these stories, where the inspired can’t contain their joy so they jump up and dance.

Look at this passage from Mary Baker Eddy in the light of exuberance:

Willingness to become as a little child and to leave the old for the new, renders thought receptive of the advanced idea. Gladness to leave the false landmarks and joy to see them disappear, — this disposition helps to precipitate the ultimate harmony. The purification of sense and self is a proof of progress. "Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God."

--323:32

I usually think of spiritual gladness and joy as kind of calm, a blissful state like a balmy Sunday afternoon. Today though I’m imagining it as a child’s enthusiasm for seeing a friend they love or doing a special activity. They do it with their whole being, with no reservation. They drink every drop of fun and learning from the experience with relish. Gladness and joy to me today mean dancing in the sunlight, twirling and laughing.

What are you happy about today? Show the worldget up and dance!


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Wednesday, April 12, 2006

All the fuss about Judas

The Gospel of Judas (found in a cave in the 1970’s) has recently been published after painstaking restoration. Read about it in Newsweek.

And of course, it’s turning people on their ears. I guess it tells the story of Judas’ betrayal of Jesus before the crucifixion as though Jesus had planned it all out with Judas. Meaning it was Judas’ assignment.

It’s kind of reminding me of Wicked, the novel that tells the Wizard of Oz story from the witch’s point of view. It’s a musical now, too. In the novel, the witch Elphaba is a sympathetic character who rises to the top after a poor upbringing and vile circumstances. Oz the Wizard is a rival politician who wants the witch out of the way to satiate his own ambition. Dorothy is a dimwit who mindlessly traipses through Oz and kills her. Etc.

Everyone’s got a point of view. I’ve had a theory for years that even the most hardened criminal thinks they’re doing the right thing. That there’s some overriding reason that makes their actions correct to themselves, even if totally selfish. The rest of us, looking in from the outside, think we can condemn because whatever they’ve done is outside the norm of accepted behavior. But to the perpetrator, what they did was just fine. Punishment doesn’t change that; reform only comes when the criminal can see what they were doing was wrong. Only then can they change their ways.

So, Judas. A friend once proposed the theory that of all the disciples, Judas was in charge of the money. And, he’d seen Jesus disappear through angry mobs, walk on water, raise the dead. When the offer of 30 pieces of silver came to him, he may have thought this would solve all their money troubles, and that Jesus would be fine. Jesus could always escape, and they would have the money. No one would be mad at him once it was all over. When it didn’t turn out that way, he was horrified.

Newsweek quotes Nag Hammadi scholar James Robinson: “[The Gospel of Judas] tells us nothing about the historical Jesus, nothing about the historical Judas. It only tells what, 100 years later, Gnostics were doing with the story they found in the canonical Gospels.”

Seems like we’re always struggling to make sense of this world we live in, as though we could figure it out and understand each other completely. Why would Judas do such a thing? Why do people kill each other or cheat each other or hurt each other?

Honestly, I don’t think there’s any reason beyond a limited sense of what goodness is. Meaning, we think we’ll achieve or acquire something we perceive as good if we do these things. Then, it doesn’t turn out right and we learn our mistake, or what we’ve acquired disappoints us.

What’s needed in all this is understanding that the source of all good is Spirit. We can’t acquire good by scrambling around humanly. We must lift our gaze upward and see that it’s already raining down on us continually. This upward view keeps us from criminal scrambling.

And, to my thinking, any criminal, including Judas, can be redeemed by learning this truth.

Some food for thought:

A magistrate sometimes remits the penalty, but this may be no moral benefit to the criminal, and at best, it only saves the criminal from one form of punishment. The moral law, which has the right to acquit or condemn, always demands restitution before mortals can "go up higher."

--11:5-10

Lust, malice, and all sorts of evil are diseased beliefs, and you can destroy them only by destroying the wicked motives which produce them. If the evil is over in the repentant mortal mind, while its effects still remain on the individual, you can remove this disorder as God's law is fulfilled and reformation cancels the crime.

--404:10-15


Have a wicked good day. :)


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Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Spiritual healing: Why?

I often get the question, or hear that my friends get the question, Why do you use spiritual healing?

As you can tell from this blog, I’m a Christian Scientist. Part of practicing this Science is learning how to rely on spiritual Truth for physical wellbeing. It’s not a some kind of test of devotion or denying myself anything good in the name of religious doctrine. It’s actually an entirely positive decision. So today, I wanted to share some reasons why I find this practice so great, and why I continue to use it even when simple physical solutions might be available.

No side effects. Relying on spiritual healing doesn’t entail any physical side-effects. We hear in every drug ad on TV how the person using the drug can expect all kinds of peripheral effects. If spiritual healing has any side effects, they’re entirely positive. Meaning, I become a better person along with being healed.

Moves you toward Spirit. Learning spiritual Truth and applying it to your life puts you on the path toward increased understanding. I love this element to healing. I cherish the lessons I’ve learned, and they only make me want to learn more. Because I’ve gained so much from healing, well beyond physical cure, I’m more confident every time.

You learn something. Each spiritual healing I experience adds to my reservoir of spiritual understanding. I remember the spiritual lessons long after the memory of the physical problem has faded, and I build on them continually.

You become a better person. Achieving spiritual healing doesn’t just fix you physically, it also develops you morally and spiritually. It smoothes the rough edges of character and gives a deeper perspective of goodness and love. When you become confident of God’s love for you, you are more able to love others.

You can face everything head on. The more you see results from spiritual healing, the more confidence you have about facing anything life throws your way. It’s not just about physical wellbeing, but also mental, emotional, financial. You gain the courage to work through all problems, from relationships to jobs to world events. You find that nothing is beyond the reach of prayer.

It’s preventative. Spiritual healing as part of ongoing spiritual practice and discipline prevents disease as well as curing it. I walk through the world with the assumption of health. Sickness for me is the anomaly. I believe I’ve been blessed in untold ways because of the safety provided through Christian Science.

I could go on and on. The important point to me is that relying on spiritual healing isn’t denying myself anything. It’s embracing something that’s so good for me, so wholesome, so uplifting, that it wouldn’t even occur to me to choose something else or to give it up.

If you practice spiritual healing, what means the most to you?

If you’re curious about it, what questions do you have?


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Monday, April 10, 2006

Making the shards whole?

I saw the DVD of Bee Season on Friday, very interesting film. In it, a family of four each wrestles with their own living of the idea of tikkun olam, or making the shards whole. (The movie site also had a cool spiritual journey page.)

On tikkun olam, this from Wikipedia.com:

Lurianic kabbalah holds that the very creation of the universe by God was unstable, and that the early universe, represented by a pottery vessel, could not hold the holy light of God (the Ein Sof or infinite). In this view, the original form of the universe shattered in shards; the universe that we encounter today is thus literally broken, and in need of repair. According to this belief, the practice of following halakha (Jewish religious law) is in order that one can repair the tattered shards of creation through their deeds. Therefore, through each fulfillment of a commanded deed (mitzvah) the kabbalists believe, a Jew performs an act of tikkun olam, gradually returning the universe to its form as God originally intended, and making mankind a partner in God's creation.

Inner Frontier also has an explanation.

So I’ve been thinking about this all weekend. What is my role in making the shards whole? Do I have a role in this process?

Mary Baker Eddy touches on this in describing her own spiritual journey of discovering the unreality of evil:

The equipollence of God brought to light another glorious proposition, — man's perfectibility and the establishment of the kingdom of heaven on earth.

--Science and Health

There are many ways to work toward the establishment of the kingdom of heaven on earth. You can do your own good deeds as the opportunity presents itself. You can work for a strong family and raise good children. You can become an activist, promoting social or economic change. You can volunteer in organizations with missions that inspire you.

To me, for any of these to be effective, you need the understanding of the underlying reality of Spirit. Meaning, it’s harder to fix things when we perceive them as broken than if we see them as spiritually whole already.

It’s working form the basis that Spirit’s will is already done, that Spirit never did cooperate with matter (the vessel) to create. That the vessel has always been a limited view of the glory that is Spirit, and could never have held it. Spirit would never have attempted putting its own idea into something so unlike itself. Spirit does not employ trial and error; Spirit is prefect already.

Working to improve this present mortal seeming is a worthy effort, but it’s not the final goal. We improve as a stepping stone to becoming one with Spirit, which ultimately will lead to the destruction of matter and our own exaltation as Spirit’s idea. I think of it as the difference between wanting the Garden of Eden and wanting the Kingdom of Heaven.

The former implies a perfect, happy, carefree material world—an impossibility really. With matter there will always be limitation and death. The latter, the Kingdom of Heaven, implies spiritual existence free from any constraint of limitation, wholly perfect, self-existent, joyous, free. Eternal life.

So, the shards. Bind them up, heal the hurts, comfort the comfortless. But know that’s not the end of the story. It’s a glimpse beyond the veil to reality, where healing and comforting are no longer necessary and glory reigns.


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Friday, April 07, 2006

Scare yourself every day

Kids Discover, a magazine I originally subscribed to because I have kids, remains one of my favorite reading adventures. My kids have long since stopped reading them, but I go through each one cover to cover and they’re all saved on magazine racks downstairs in anticipation of grandchildren someday.

The April 2006 issue is on the Depression. It includes a fabulous quote from Eleanor Roosevelt:

Do one thing every day that scares you.

This reminds me of the question I often challenge myself with: What would I do if there were no fear? (I wrote about this way back when in Litany against fear.)

I still use that question all the time. It clarifies things for me. In fact, being afraid itself is like a dare to me—the issue instantly becomes something I want to blow through with spiritual power.

Not that I’m never afraid. I’m afraid all the time. Of walking in to a room full of strangers, of putting my foot in my mouth, of showing my impatience too much, of running out of resources, of losing the love of people close to me. But there’s always a higher right, a worthy task to do, or an uplifted outlook that makes whatever I need to do worthwhile.

I walked into a room full of strangers yesterday. It was a networking meeting for my writing/editing business, and I didn’t know a soul in the room. There’s always a flutter as I navigate to a new location and walk in the door to a new building. What will happen? Will this be worth it? Will anyone notice me or like me?

Yet time and time again I remind myself that we're all children of the same divine Parent. Everyone in that room is already a brother or sister, I'm just now meeting them for the first time. So what is there to fear? There's always a spiritual truth or two that encourages me to take the plunge, no matter what the issue is. If I didn't blow through my fear, I'd do nothing.

So I plaster that smile on my face and go in gamely, business cards in one hand and the other outstretched to shake. And that scary hoard becomes one after the other of nice people. Just nice people also there to promote their businesses and connect. I left with a fistful of cards and appointments, and even one new client.

What scares you today? Go do it!

Have a great weekend!


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Thursday, April 06, 2006

Freedom to create the path

Another book for my wishlist: American Gospel : God, the Founding Fathers, and the Making of a Nation by Jon Meacham. Newsweek has an excerpt here.

I love how the excerpt points out that America has been diverse since the beginning. Not even entirely a Christian nation at the outset, we included Jews and made treaties with Muslims. The religious freedom of the States was a magnet for those who couldn’t find it in their homelands.

I think not having a state religion is one of the greatest strengths of America. Freedom to choose devotion—or not—guarantees that if we’re pursuing a spiritual path at all, it’s because we really are engaged. Freedom to break from the tradition of our elders also ensures that if we continue with those traditions, it’s because we value them. It makes religion stronger to have adherents involved willingly, even if the numbers ebb and flow.

Freedom of religion implies freedom of thought. And free thought is the engine of progress and growth. I believe the American foundation of freedom made it possible for the country to be the birthplace of the teaching I follow—Christian Science. This, of course, makes me deeply grateful for the freedom that allowed Mary Baker Eddy to forge ahead with her movement. She writes, “Spiritual rationality and free thought accompany approaching Science, and cannot be put down” (Science and Health). You can’t have one without the other.

So I can hardly at this point try to coerce people to my way of thinking. If it’s freedom that got us here, it’s freedom that will continue to strengthen us. I need to respect and defend the individual right to choose—or not choose—their own spiritual path.

I didn’t always understand this. As a young woman, I was quite dogmatic, with a superior attitude about my faith and a wish for everyone else to embrace it. This made me inaccessible to my friends when they were in need. It wasn’t until years later, through my own growth and mistakes, that I began to see that each of us is on our own path and each of those paths is precious.

This morning when thinking about the path I'm on, I suddenly saw it as hacking my way through a jungle. In other words, the path isn’t already established, all paved and golden. It’s a path *I’m creating* with the lessons I learn and the direction I choose. Reminds me of this passage from Eddy’s book Science and Health:

A book introduces new thoughts, but it cannot make them speedily understood. It is the task of the sturdy pioneer to hew the tall oak and to cut the rough granite. Future ages must declare what the pioneer has accomplished.

--vii:22

The path is ours to create. Freedom makes that easier, even if it seems chaotic while we’re all hacking away. And respect for each other can bring us companions for the journey.


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Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Loved even while sinful

There’s a passage from Romans where Paul really hits the nail on the head (it’s in the Bible Lesson this week):

the law is holy, and the commandment holy, and just, and good.

For we know that the law is spiritual: but I am carnal, sold under sin. For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I.

For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do.

--Romans

The perfect corollary sentence can be found in the readings from Science and Health:

The belief of life in matter sins at every step.

--p. 542

When I find myself getting worn out by this material existence, and everything I’m doing just makes me want to lie down and go to sleep, it’s actually comforting to remember that this is not all I am. And to remember that it’s not my obligation to be perfect in this material existence, nor is it my job to make this existence perfect.

For I can never do it—I can never achieve perfection through my supposed material being. When I remember this, I leave behind the sense of struggle, and remember that it’s all about doing my best. Which, I have to say, I’m generally doing. But I’m never going to get it just right here on earth because earth itself, as a material construct, is flawed.

So where is the good that I do? I like to think that the good I express, even in its limited form here on earth, is still permanent and real. The essence of who I am as the expression of the Divine *is* real and is in fact all that I’m doing. God gives me credit for motives and for doing my best. That is so comforting to me.

There was a time when I had “sinned against God,” but really wanted to come clean. I had gotten pregnant when I wasn’t married. My lifestyle up to that point had been sketchy at best, I’d developed a lot of bad habits of thinking and acting, and it landed me in that situation. My anguished prayers to God for help did not go unanswered. I gained the spiritual strength to resolve to change my ways.

But who was going to believe me? I realized *no one* would believe that I’d make such a fundamental shift overnight. I couldn’t prove it materially in any way; my actions were too well known among my acquaintances. Who knew that my change of heart was real?

The answer was: God knew. I took it to God in all sincerity, and made my vow that the change was real. I remember being embraced spiritually at that point, and comforted that divine Love was seeing right into my heart and could tell I’d really been transformed. I didn’t need to prove anything because Love could read my very being.

My human life was still a mess and I had to work my way out of it. But the sincerity of my change of heart sustained me through it all and fueled my receptiveness to the goodness God was sending my way. Many things fell into place instantly that on the outside I didn’t deserve. God read my heart, and cared for me.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that even in this sinful state of belief in matter, Love still comes to us and cares for us. We don’t have to be perfect human beings, in fact, we never can be. But our motives and desires for good count for something. Love sees and acknowledges these even if no one else can.


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Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Hang on to the angel

In honor of Jacob’s experience at Peniel, which is in the Bible Lesson this week, I wanted to bring up again a blog entry I wrote some time ago: What does it take? which tells of my own personal Peniel experience.

I’ve also used on many occasions the idea of not letting go of the angel until it blesses you. Jacob hangs on to that angel visitor until his very nature is transformed—he even gets a new name, Israel. And to me, this is an important discipline whenever we pray.

Early in my spiritual journey, I’d get flashes of inspiration only to say, Oh, that was nice. I’d let it uplift my day a bit but then go about my business as usual. It’s only been in this latter part of my life that I’ve gotten into the habit of clinging to every drop of inspiration that comes to me until it resonates throughout my whole being and I feel reborn.

I think this clinging to inspiration until we’re transformed is essential to the deeper spiritual connection many seek. A lot of people have asked me how to go deeper, and I generally will trot out Jacob and Peniel. The question, in conjunction with the prior blog entry I mention above, is: Are we willing to be truly transformed by our prayer?

Sometimes of course, all we really want is to feel better. To go back to the way things were, to be comfortable again in the very situation that created the necessity for healing. But true effective prayer radically alters our self-perception. It lets in what God thinks of us, which is away and beyond any limited self-concept. Small wonder that this God-like perception would change us! And small wonder that it sometimes is overwhelming and we shy away from it.

But I’m recommending today that we cling to it. That whenever we get a glimpse of what God knows, we hang on for dear life and let it re-write our very natures.

If we do, it’s guaranteed that our human existence will change, perhaps in ways that surprise us. What a great adventure it is to ride on the wings of that spiritual discovery. To not be settled into a human complacency but to be light and fluid and ready to evolve.

Am I always ready? Sometimes not! Sometimes I’d rather just sleep it off. It’s a sign of God’s great mercy, though, that the angel always comes back. And then, when I’m ready, I enjoy the ride.


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Monday, April 03, 2006

Late better than never?

Sorry to be so late today!

And it seems my whole life is about being late. I totally missed the Daylight Savings switchover, which made me totally miss teaching Sunday school. I’ve done this a couple times before, but usually I’m able to pull myself together enough to get there maybe 15 minutes late. This time I missed the whole thing!

I felt especially bad because one of the kids was bringing a friend, and had called me the day before to make sure I’d be there. “Of course I’ll be there!” I answered heartily. Fortunately, the superintendent stood in for me, and afterward, when I was shamefacedly arriving to serve at the nearby Reading Room for the after church hours, the kids came over and we sat and talked for a while.

I hate letting down a friend. It’s such a nasty feeling. Sure, it was a mistake, but I can’t tell you how much I hate making mistakes. I discovered something interesting when talking to my sister a few months ago. I realized that unless I’m getting an “A” in something, I feel like I’m failing. How weird is that?

It comes down to trust, that theme I’ve been exploring lately. That even if my human efforts aren’t perfect, there’s still a God making everything work out harmoniously. I trust myself too much; I should trust God more. Not to blow off my responsibilities, but to see life as a series of growth opportunities rather than pass/fail events.

I need to read my own blog entry about Principle again. About everything being orderly and in its place. About God’s government and my role in its unfoldment. And just rest in the calm assurance that all is well.


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