Let us rise up and build

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Louisana's governor has declared today a day of prayer. And along with the dear people in the US, please let's also include in our prayers those in the stampede in Baghdad.

I wanted to share an email I got yesterday from my friend in Florida (mentioned Monday). I asked him how he was praying at this time.

Okay...hurricanes...I have to admit...I am a little in shock as well. I know [my wife] and i are looking for the best way to send contributions...etc....but it is a hard one to deal with. In many ways...it is like trying to make sense of the tsunami and its aftermath. You can look for as many positives as you want, but they are hard to find. You know this will bring people together...you know there will be many inspiring stories...but knowing that thousands are homeless...and that so many died...it is a hard one to swallow.

All i can really do this morning is humbly turn to God...and reiterate what I know to be spiritually true about man and his relationship to God. I know that life is Spirit...never in nor of matter...and that life is eternal because it is spiritual. So, whether my limited human perception can see life or not...I know life is indeed going on for all of those people.

I also know that God is meeting every human need...and that it is not about houses and possessions...but it is about Love...and that God will meet every human need with abundance. I am seeing that man has never been separate from God's care...and that good is constantly going on. Love is the law, and I am doing my best to give no power to any news report, image, or aftermath that tries to present a power in opposition to God. This is what I am sticking with this morning.

The purity of this prayer brought tears to my eyes. Even through all our sorrow, these spiritual truths are true. Spirituality allows us to feel sorrow and hope at the same time—and know that while sorrow endures for a night, joy cometh in the morning.

I'm also appreciating this week's Christian Science Bible Lesson. It includes the story of Nehemiah, who was inspired by God to rebuild the city of Jerusalem—to heal the breaches in the walls even.

I find so many parallels here with New Orleans. One of the most rousing sentences in the Bible is the people's reply to Nehemiah's call to action: "Let us rise up and build." The Bible then says, "So they strengthened their hands for this good work."

This vision moved me yesterday: The people of New Orleans, with the help of the world community, rising up and rebuilding their city. Our prayers and contributions can give them the strength they need for this mighty work, and we'll see a city rising from the ruins the like of which has never been seen before.

At the end of Nehemiah's story, everyone can tell that "this work was wrought of our God." We'll see God's merciful hand again at the mouth of the Mississippi. Let's keep that vision in mind.

Through toil, struggle, and sorrow, what do mortals attain? They give up their belief in perishable life and happiness; the mortal and material return to dust, and the immortal is reached.

--Science and Health

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Hurricane prayer

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I've been watching some video on CNN.com about Hurricane Katrina. Some of it is inspiring, much of it is devastating. Two clips that gave me hope were the rescue from a rooftop by helicopter, and the film of a statue of Jesus in the French Quarter that survived trees falling all around it.

But I can't begin to know what it's like for the people still trapped in their homes. I think what I'd like to share today is a piece I wrote for 9/11. (The original version is available on the Website for The Christian Science Publishing Society.) The one below I've altered a bit to make it fit today's situation. And as I think of each person below this hurricane cloud as my brother, the prayer widens and blankets the country.

My prayer for my brother

At the moment I write this, I've just heard that [the building my brother works in has collapsed]. I've been in touch with my family around the country, and we're all praying. This is my prayer for my brother.

Where can my heart go when there is no news, and perhaps no hope? I must go to the one almighty God. I must know His almighty presence.

My thought now is echoing with God.

I dig deep into what I know to be true. There is only one God, divine Life, holy Love. The God that my brother loves and serves is the God that connects us all. My thought now is echoing with God, that oneness that fills all space, [in homes, roadways, beach fronts, Superdomes]. I refuse to conceive of any space that is not filled with God. I place my brother in that space, wholeheartedly. He can't leave that space, it surrounds him and upholds him and guides him.

I see my brother continuing to walk through life, as he has every day until now and will forever, with the glory of God shining through him. I'm not seeing his life as something that can end. I'm seeing it as eternal, as full, complete, ideal. I'm clinging to this, because the thought that there may be death to deal with in my family's future cannot be the final word. The final word must be Life. It must be God.

God is there, in [New Orleans, Biloxi, Mobile]. God is here with me in [Massachusetts, where the same storm cloud darkens the sky]. It's not a bunch of gods scattered all about, but the one God, literally filling all space, blanketing all creation. I touch that one God in thought and I'm touching all creation. And that God is holding my brother close, with all the others—all of them.

It's not only my brother or our family. It's entire buildings, entire cities, entire countries. I'm putting it all in the divine space, everyone, every action, every lifespan. That space contains nothing but Love and glory. The pain, fear and confusion are nothing within that holy place.

My brother and all the people involved are in that holy place. I am holding them there in thought. It is the structure of Love that surrounds them, and it cannot be destroyed.

Later I got word that my brother was ten minutes away from his office when the building was hit.

Even though this prayer is almost exactly four years old, it's still true. I'm looking at it anew, embracing in thought folks still in their houses, rescue workers, refugees, even pets. Just holding close the idea that all powerful Spirit is there, a presence that cuts through the wind and rain and touches the hearts of those who might be afraid or hurt.

Spirit is there.

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Prayer for Louisiana

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This morning I'm holding in prayer the citizens of New Orleans. Hurricane Katrina is threatening, and a million people have evacuated the city.

At times like this, I long to marshal the power of prayer to bring safety and hope. I know many individuals are praying, but it's also great to know that we're all praying together. And God is there.

Last year I had the privilege of being involved in an online effort to support the people of Florida with prayer. Many hundreds of people participated in a Weblog started by a friend of mine down in Florida. He wound up with prayers and messages of support from as far away as Turkey and Australia.

Here's one message that was posted that I found particularly helpful at the time:

[Our friend in Florida] said earlier he wasn’t praying to stop the hurricane. I think that’s very wise. Hurricanes are a natural part of the earthly system – they actually serve a useful purpose. What needs to be prayed for is that no harm comes to people. This doesn't involve asking God to change reality, it just acknowledges that anything normal or useful is not at the same time destructive and harmful.

Prayer can also elevate thought so as to discern the wisest decisions to make. This can involve evacuation as well as measures to protect property. I heard a story on NPR the other day about a woman whose house had been destroyed in hurricane Opal a few years back. She rebuilt according to construction guidelines for hurricane-prone areas and her house survived Ivan.

This, to me, is an example of how human thought can be led to institute wise policies to protect against natural events. After all, if it weren't for the presence of humans on earth, these things would just go along their course and not be characterized as evil.

So let’s pray to lift thought beyond fear and foreboding to discern the wisest course to take in order to preserve life and harmony.

-mop

While I'm not on the scene as my friend was, this year I'm holding Louisiana close in my heart. I hope as you pray today you feel a part of a universal prayer circle being brought to bear on the situation, and that through our united prayers we can make a difference.

I've also been thinking about how wonderful it would be if we could all be alerted when prayer is needed. Visitors to this blog could start a "prayer alert" email to be notified whenever someone wants specific united prayer for a particular situation.

Here's a very brief survey that you could take to let me know if a prayer alert would be of interest. There are some other email newsletter options included as well—I'd love to know your thoughts, so please be honest!

Newsletters Survey

Thanks for your input, it's so appreciated.

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In search of spirituality

Newsweek has pegged it again. They dedicated their summer double issue (Aug. 29/Sept. 5) to the most important topic today: spirituality.

The main article "In Search of Spirituality" starts by referring to the Time article from 1966, "Is God Dead?" After some fascinating observations about the 1966 article, Newsweek says:

"What was dying in 1966 was a well-meaning but arid theology born of rationalism: a wavering trumpet call for ethical behavior, a search for meaning in a letter to the editor in favor of civil rights. What would be born in its stead, in a cycle of renewal that has played itself out many times since the Temple of Solomon, was a passion for an immediate, transcendent experience of God."

How true is this? My thinking is that it exactly tracks with all that I've heard or experienced about spirituality for the last ten years.

Now, when people call me for spiritual help and healing, they're demanding not just words but a *feeling.* They want to feel the presence of the Divine in their lives, in their hearts. It's become a waste of time to quote inspirational passages at someone and expect that to help them. What I spend more time encouraging people to do is to put aside their books and rituals and instead *commune* deeply with Spirit. And I try to write in this blog about *how* to do that.

What I find also, though, which the Newsweek article doesn't cover, is sometimes a resistance to what this communion implies — transformation. People love to feel God's presence when it comforts and inspires them; it's not always as easy to feel the real whap that comes when you need to change something fundamental within yourself in order to grow further. To let go of your fears and even sins (such as resentment, self-justification and the like) and be reshaped by Spirit. Perhaps this is the next phase.

Sometimes I ponder how to help people through the times of struggle. What a wonderful thing it would be if we could all support and love each other through our transformations. I sometimes envision a spiritual community where people could bring the things they're struggling with and can find encouragement, love and acceptance to support them. Unfortunately, at this point, often our spiritual community is the *last* place we'll confess to be struggling.

But what tremendous growth would occur if we could bring our struggles to the altar, and find there both Spirit and companionship on the journey. For certainly someone in this spiritual group would be on the other side of whatever situation we're facing. And they'd be able to joyously assure us that the struggle is worth it, that we'll find our answers, and that they're behind us all the way. Personally, I think that would help a lot.

It seems like the next logical step. As more and more people commune directly with Spirit, they're going to want to share what they've learned with each other. This sharing will not be to develop doctrines or procedures, but to reveal the infinite nature of Spirit and how it communicates with us. No one else will experience exactly what I experience, but my talking about my experiences will open the thought of others to finding their own individual connection with the Divine. And when we hear what another has learned, our own concept of the Divine expands and we become more open as well.

I hope you'll check out the Newsweek articles. And let me know what you think!

The calm, strong currents of true spirituality, the manifestations of which are health, purity, and self-immolation, must deepen human experience, until the beliefs of material existence are seen to be a bald imposition, and sin, disease, and death give everlasting place to the scientific demonstration of divine Spirit and to God's spiritual, perfect man.

--Science and Health

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"Avert!"

Note: Laura will be traveling for a couple days, so the next entry will be on Friday, Aug. 26. Have a great Thursday!

…Ged said at last, "…It may be that I must spend my life running from sea to sea and land to land on an endless vain venture, a shadow-quest."

"Avert!" said Vetch, turning his left hand in the gesture that turns aside the ill chance spoken of. For all his somber thoughts this made Ged grin a little, for it is rather a child's charm than a wizard's; there was always such village innocence in Vetch. Yet also he was keen, shrewd, direct to the center of a thing.

--The Wizard of Earthsea, by Ursula LeGuin

When I was a kid, I developed my own version of "Avert!"

I didn't have many friends back then. Accepting the idea that no one liked me probably contributed to the cycle of not making friends, so this went on for years.

Then, as I've described before, I went to camp, and learned more about being a child of Love. That because Love created me, I must actually be lovable.

Thinking it through, I came to the conclusion then that whenever someone appeared to not like me, that was just what Mary Baker Eddy describes as "mortal mind."

See, to my child mind, Christian Science explained that whatever my five physical senses told me was not the real picture. It couldn’t be true because it wasn't spiritual. Only spiritual sense would tell me what I needed to know. And only spiritual sense would reveal what people needed to know about me.

Believing what the senses said implied that you were taking on the mind of mortality, because everything physical ultimately dies. This "mortal mind" always leads us falsely.

So, when someone was mean to me, I reasoned it through thusly.

• The only things telling me about the meanness are my eyes and my ears. I wouldn’t know about the meanness if I didn’t believe my eyes and ears.
  
• My spiritual sense tells me that this person being mean is really a child of God. They're not actually capable of meanness, because they're made by Love, just as I am.
  
• The appearance of meanness is just mortal mind.
  
• We're both loved and lovable. I am going to love.

The more I did this, the quicker it got, until eventually the thought process winnowed down to, "That's just mortal mind."

And this little "spell" if you will had an interesting effect over time. Conflict would arise in some form, be it irritation or anger or meanness, and it would begin to bother me and I'd feel unliked. But that feeling became a reminder in and of itself. I'd do my own mental "Avert!" and think, "That's just mortal mind."

Recognizing conflict as mortal mind allowed me to shake it off of myself and to respond with love. As I grew, I expanded this to include suggestions of illness or depression or loneliness. Whenever something inharmonious came my way, if I successfully met it with "That's just mortal mind," I was better able to master it. It helped awaken my spiritual sense and discern what is spiritually true.

I still perform this mental "Avert!" when needed. "That's just mortal mind" is step one of turning from the sense evidence and inviting Spirit to the table, and it helps me even now.

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She is complete already

A continuation of yesterday’s entry…

With some more time to sit down and pray about my daughter at college now, further ideas came to me.

One of the key philosophies of parenting that I got from Christian Science is that each of us is complete upon creation. In other words, Spirit didn’t leave anything out when we were created—our being is a reflection of the Divine and therefore contains all that makes us its image and likeness.

So I trained myself at the birth of my children not to see them as incomplete biological beings, but as the total expression of God. As their human parent, I would see this unfold from within them, not be adding anything to them. I didn’t have to re-create them in any way, but be a witness to their own revelation of who they are.

Now as I think of my daughter having outgrown home and moved on to college, this idea is comforting me again. She has all that she needs within her. She is complete right now, the total magnificent expression of infinite Soul. The new environment of college will allow her to manifest more aspects of her own infinite nature.

Christian Science presents unfoldment, not accretion; it manifests no material growth from molecule to mind, but an impartation of the divine Mind to man and the universe.

Science and Health, 68:27-30

Mary Baker Eddy writes a lot about the “seed is in itself,” taken from the first chapter of Genesis. Such an interesting image. You could think of it as genetic material, but Eddy’s discussion of this concept makes it clear that she thought of it as idea. Ideas carry their full potential within themselves. (Read Genesis for more insights if you like.)

Even as a diamond can only show all aspects of its radiance when its angle to the light changes, so human change allows new elements of one’s being to shine forth. I’m reminded of the truism, There is no progress without change. A different setting, both for humans and for diamonds, brings out what perhaps was unseen before.

My girl is in a different setting, but all that means is the world will see a new radiance from her. I can’t wait to bask in that light.

Some more thoughts that have guided my parenting over the years:

Because man is the reflection of his Maker, he is not subject to birth, growth, maturity, decay. These mortal dreams are of human origin, not divine.

305:27

To attend properly the birth of the new child, or divine idea, you should so detach mortal thought from its material conceptions, that the birth will be natural and safe. Though gathering new energy, this idea cannot injure its useful surroundings in the travail of spiritual birth. A spiritual idea has not a single element of error, and this truth removes properly whatever is offensive. The new idea, conceived and born of Truth and Love, is clad in white garments. Its beginning will be meek, its growth sturdy, and its maturity undecaying. When this new birth takes place, the Christian Science infant is born of the Spirit, born of God, and can cause the mother no more suffering. By this we know that Truth is here and has fulfilled its perfect work.

463:6

CHILDREN. The spiritual thoughts and representatives of Life, Truth, and Love.

582:28

Whatever is governed by God, is never for an instant deprived of the light and might of intelligence and Life.

215:12

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She's on her way

Phew, what a weekend! As mentioned on Friday, we moved my daughter to college. Not what I was expecting at all, either emotionally, financially, or logistically. But I am so proud of her, she’s at an exceptional school, and she’s on the road to the life she wants.

There’s one song that has always reminded me of her:

Child of Mine by Carole King

We’d stayed up late on Friday night, too, watching home videos of her when she was small. There’s this great clip of her talking about sending her baby doll to college. It's way cute, we were quoting it all weekend. The doll was going to college because "it’s her birthday over there!" said with the very broad Massachusetts accent she had when she was small.

So college has been on our minds since she was very little. Another great song:

The Babysitter’s Here by Dar Williams

The message that you shouldn’t have to choose between college and a relationship has been a theme of mine throughout her upbringing. And she did indeed leave behind a boyfriend to go off to school. It was tougher than we both thought it would be.

As we sat in her dorm room saying our good-byes, and the tears started to flow, I said, "Honey, we’ve been preparing for this moment for 18 years. You are so ready for this. You’re right where you wanted to be, at the best school for what you want to do, and it’s gonna be great." Then we listened to the Carole King song together, made one last trip to the campus store, and waved to her from the car as we drove off.

I’m left thinking, wow. There are these moments in life where you can see great growth is ahead. Sometimes changes happen gradually, sometimes huge changes happen in ONE DAY. There’s a time of acclimation, but the growth is assured just as the forsythias outside her bedroom window at home burst into bloom each spring.

She is going to grow so much. But she had grown too much already to stay at home. She’d been growing and growing, and this weekend, the circumstances both caught up with her already achieved growth and will provide the environment for further, profound, unimaginable growth that could not have been achieved at home. As she comes into her own, she is going to change the world.

She’s already making her mark. Do you know what she did the first night at the dorm? Stayed up late talking with her suitemates about Christian Science and spirituality.

She’s still my girl.

You don't need direction, you know which way to go
And I don't want to hold you back, I just want to watch you grow
You're the one who taught me you don't have to look behind
Oh yes, sweet darling
So glad you are a child of mine

--Child of Mine, Carole King

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Tomorrow she leaves...

Today is my daughter’s last day at home. Tomorrow we’re driving her to college, and from now on, when she’s here, it will be more like she’s a guest than a roommate.

Yesterday I got a phone call from someone who had just interviewed her for a project, and his first words were: “You should drop everything and write a book about how you parented such a radiant and spiritually minded young woman.” A wonderful thing to hear just before sending her off into the world!

So this weekend will probably contain a lot of introspection on my part as we drive, unpack and go through orientation. Sure, there were things I did intentionally, but also she has always been amazing material. How much was nature and how much was nurture isn’t easy to define.

But what I do know is that consistently since she was in my womb, I haven’t thought of myself as her parent. I gave all that credit to God. For 16 out of her 18 years, I’ve been single, so I knew there was no way I could do it all myself. God, the divine Father-Mother, has been a presence in our home, guiding me both to make good decisions and to apologize for my mistakes.

And I’ve made many mistakes. But when I admit them, and let on to the kids that this was MY mistake and not theirs, they have the opportunity to forgive me. We all grew from this. I knew I was going to make mistakes, so I made a commitment to diffuse them as I went by noticing them and apologizing. I suspect that learning to forgive my admitted mistakes has also allowed them to get beyond the faults in myself I haven’t yet recognized, but they know only too well. Bless them for their resilience.

For it can’t be easy having me for a mother. I have high expectations, not a whole lot of patience, and the circumstances have forced them both to grow up much faster than many of their friends. There is no way I could be ushering them into adulthood without the holy Father-Mother to smooth my rough edges and support them as they grow.

You’ll most likely hear more about this on Monday (and maybe Tuesday… and Wednesday…)—it’s that time for me! And I’d love to know from any of you who have parented children, either your own or others: What qualities do you think make the best parents? What qualities are essential? What should we avoid?

And for all of you preparing your young ones to take wing into the world: you’ve done your best, they’re extraordinary people, and all will be well. Really now, we can sit back and enjoy watching them take to the clouds.

Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

--Proverbs

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Communion for Brother Roger

I learned of the tragedy of Brother Roger’s death from the Beautiful Day weblog, and I’m joining in prayer with the many thousands mourning this man today.

If you do not know about Brother Roger’s work in Taizé, France (and I confess to having been ignorant myself), I encourage you to click through The Community site—it’s very inspiring. I also love Brother Roger’s meditations on communion.

Join me in prayer today for humanity’s continued growth toward universal communion. For Brother Roger is right; in this way only will we achieve peace.

Here are Mary Baker Eddy’s words on the spiritual meaning of the many symbols of the Christian Church:

Our baptism is a purification from all error. Our church is built on the divine Principle, Love. We can unite with this church only as we are new-born of Spirit, as we reach the Life which is Truth and the Truth which is Life by bringing forth the fruits of Love, — casting out error and healing the sick. Our Eucharist is spiritual communion with the one God. Our bread, "which cometh down from heaven," is Truth. Our cup is the cross. Our wine the inspiration of Love, the draught our Master drank and commended to his followers.

--Science and Health

Today may be a special day to embody these ideals. Let’s honor Brother Roger with a deeper commitment, and welcome all the world into genuine spiritual communion.

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No mixed blessings

Just a simple thought for today—there are no mixed blessings.

I became convinced of this many years ago, and it’s always helped. So many times good comes our way, but there’s a knee-jerk “this is too good to be true” feeling. Like it can’t be only good but must come with some sort of bad. But the more I’ve gotten to know the Supreme Source of all good, the less I believe good is anything less than perfect.

Divine Spirit, Love, is only good. Spirit sends only good to us. When we receive it, it’s only good. When it makes our lives better, it only makes things better.

Check this out:

All substance, intelligence, wisdom, being, immortality, cause, and effect belong to God. These are His attributes, the eternal manifestations of the infinite divine Principle, Love. No wisdom is wise but His wisdom; no truth is true, no love is lovely, no life is Life but the divine; no good is, but the good God bestows.

--Science and Health

If God bestows it, it’s good. If He didn’t bestow it, it’s not even worth wanting, for “no good is, but the good God bestows.”

Another favorite prayer:

Open thou mine eyes, that I may behold wondrous things out of thy law.

--Psalms

Blessings from God are only good. Open your eyes and see.

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Stop and smell the curry

Today I want to give gratitude for the richness of life. The last few days were filled with crazy activity, all of it good.

1. India Day Celebration in Boston (more on this below)
2. Many opportunities to pray for people, including deep conversations and inspiring results
3. A wonderful lunch with two spiritually minded girlfriends
4. Nice opportunities to use my editing and writing skills—I even worked on my novel
5. The weather here in New England finally cooled off :)
6. A special hour with a Sunday School student

I am quite proud of myself for India Day. My daughter had joined a dance troupe with her Indian friend, and had spent hours learning this complicated ethnic routine with the other girls. But on our way in to Boston, it RAINED. I don’t mean a little shower, but thunder, lightning, massive drops, drenching rain.

But we kept driving! And this is so not like me, to stay on an adventure when things get uncomfortable. Usually I’m the first to turn back—I can make a very logical case for the sensible, snug course of action. But on we drove, my daughter, her friend, her boyfriend, and me.

When we got into the city, we found a great parking spot almost instantly, even though the area around the celebration was blocked off. It was still pouring although very hot out, and we had only one umbrella for the four of us. My daughter said it would be okay if I didn’t stay, but I knew she really wanted me to see this dance. So again, very out of character, I jumped out of the car and said, Let’s go!

The start of the show was delayed until the rain let up a little, so we had plenty of time to walk around, getting soaked, peering at booths about India, smelling curry, finding the rest of the dance troupe, admiring the costumes of the other performers. The event celebrated Indian Independence Day, when the British pulled out back in the 1947. There were some speeches, and just a wonderful community feeling where everyone seemed related somehow. Not literally, but culturally.

The show started. After about seven of the thirty-something acts, though, the rain strengthened again, complete with lightning behind the Hatch Shell and thunder over the music. Finally, the organizers could see that we were all huddled under umbrella-shaped lightning rods, so they thanked us for coming and told us to go home. My daughter’s friend’s parents invited us back to their house so we could see the dance with at least the two of them. We were still soaking by the time we got back to Framingham, but watching the dance in the cozy living room had its own charm. The girls were beautiful.

So why am I proud? Because the evening did NOT go as planned, yet I was able to go with it. Early on, I just turned off my plan-o-meter, and appreciated being with my daughter. I couldn’t do anything to change the situation, and ordinarily this would have stressed me out and made me pretty cranky. But instead I just stayed in the moment and experienced this entirely out-of-the-box thing. Because there was nothing I could do, I had the time to just love what I was doing. To feel the rain, see the smiles, smell the curry. And be with my girl, a few days before she leaves for college.

It occurs to me that what we experience is a choice. The unexpected doesn’t have to throw us, we can go with it. I don’t know if I could turn off the plan-o-meter every day, but perhaps I should do it more often. For how else would God be able to surprise me like this?

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What does it take?

I’ve gotten the same question in different forms lately, and it’s along the lines of, “What does it take to grow spiritually and to understand spiritual reality?”

Some are asking for specific daily disciplines, others for a feeling or a sign, others for a requirement to commit to something. And I’ve become kind of puzzled myself, not really knowing if there is one right answer to this question. What does it take? Every person is different, every path is different. Is there one thing that, if we all did it, we’d ensure widespread spiritual growth?

So of course, I looked at my own life. How have I managed to get as far as I have along this path? I don’t believe I have any special virtues; many others are kinder, more compassionate, more intelligent, more principled. Many others know the Bible better, or the spiritual teachings of the world’s great leaders. I’m just me, Laura, slogging through life. My motivation to pursue spirituality is as much to bless my own life as it is to bless others. I’m no saint.

But I think I can pinpoint one quality of thought that I do possess, and have in fact cultivated. Without it, I would have gotten nowhere. There have been times when it’s been the one thing that’s kept me from the abyss.

This quality is willingness.

I’ve always loved this passage:

Willingness to become as a little child and to leave the old for the new, renders thought receptive of the advanced idea. Gladness to leave the false landmarks and joy to see them disappear, — this disposition helps to precipitate the ultimate harmony. The purification of sense and self is a proof of progress.

--Science and Health

Willingness to leave the old for the new. Joy to see the old disappear. Purification of sense and self. “This disposition” Mary Baker Eddy calls it, a wonderful characterization. You know how we sometimes say, “She has a lovely disposition”? It’s the person’s attitude, her frame of mind, her world view, her demeanor we’re commenting on.

So for spiritual growth, we need the disposition of willingness.

Once I had reached an impasse in my spiritual struggle. I had battled many years with the effects of a sensual mindset, but that sensuality was so entwined in my self-definition that I could not fathom giving it up. But getting hurt, once again, catapulted me into a night of wrestling. I felt like Jacob at Peniel.

All night I struggled. Back and forth, arguing with God, clinging to the past, afraid for the future. The message kept coming, gently but firmly, Laura, you’ve got to give up the sensuality. But I was convinced that I couldn’t. There was no way. I would become undesirable, boring, alone forever. But I also knew that there had been pain upon pain associated with the choices I’d made. I couldn’t think of one good thing sensuality had brought me.

Finally, as light dawned in the eastern sky out my window, I gave up. I remember feeling so exhausted, so spent. And I said one tiny thing, right into the heart of Love.

“All right, Father,” I said. “I don’t know how I’m going to do it, but I’m willing. You’ll have to help me. I don’t have the strength to do it myself. But I’m willing.”

What happened next blew me away. It was like a blazing light was turned on in the room. I felt transported, and I received a vision of something completely new. I can only describe it as a vision of complete perfection. I was inside of perfection. It was not boring or lonely—it was infinite and energized. It was light and foundation and grace. And it was clear to me that I was seeing and feeling for the first time who I really am. The perfect man, as Science and Health describes. I was the perfect man.

“Oh!” I thought. “I want that!!”

It happened that fast. All desire to be sensual dropped away in that moment. I had seen something better, and that’s what I wanted. My very desire had been reoriented spiritually. What gladness to leave the false landmarks, what joy to see them disappear. And the instantaneous receiving of that glimpse of ultimate harmony.

I have to emphasize—all it took was willingness. A deep wholehearted willingness to obey and to follow where God leads. Throwing myself at God’s feet and letting Him shape me anew.

What external path your own willingness will lead you down is individual to you. It may look to the eyes completely different than even the paths of those closest to you. But there’s only one destination. And a first step we all have to take is willingness.

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Hold them in the Light

My Australian friend Veronika sent me this link in response to yesterday’s posting:

I am here only to be truly helpful

Here’s an excerpt:

What I have learned is that when I see another person as needing to be fixed, this is wrong-minded thinking. Now I am learning to trust my brother, to know that he is not his actions, but rather he is perfect as God created him.

I have learned that if I truly want to be helpful, then the most useful thing that I can do is to hold him in the Light. By holding him in the Light, I mean that I never lose sight of his wholeness, of his holiness. I know who he is. He is God’s perfect child.

This dovetails with another passage I’ve been contemplating as part of this week’s Bible Lesson on Soul:

Man is the reflection of Soul. He is the direct opposite of material sensation, and there is but one Ego.

--Science and Health

The phrase "direct opposite of material sensation" always catches on my mind when I read it. It’s just a few words, but such a radical concept.

For if I’m the opposite of material sensation, nothing about me physically has any reality. How I sound, how I look, how I feel. I am actually the opposite of these things. And so are the people around me. How they sound, look, feel is inherently limited and can’t tell me who they really are.

So who are we? "The reflection of Soul." In order to discover what that is, an exploration of Soul is in order. And then, once that deeper understanding is gained, this is the only frame of reference to use when regarding our fellow beings. Anything less than seeing them in the light of Soul is a smokescreen, temporary, phantasmagorical.

What a person is on the outside is not who he is on the inside. To truly relate and to help, we need to respond to the inner unseen man, not react to the external appearance. Sometimes we’re required to see it even when he doesn’t. But what a relief to find that that "material sensation" is not the final word on anybody. We can indeed "hold the in the Light."

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Getting out of the way

When is it ever right to tell another person what to do?

I suppose if they’re your kids and you’re responsible for them, or your subordinates at work and you have to assign them things. Or if you’re a member of the police force, the armed forces, or a firefighter, and you have to ensure people’s safety. But I can’t think of that many other circumstances where I have the right to demand behavior from another free-thinking adult, even if they’ve explicitly asked me what I think.

This relates to a crusade I’m on within myself—to banish the word “should” from my vocabulary. He should do this, she should do that. Even having that opinion is a way of being critical, and whenever I catch myself using the word I know I’m imposing my own opinion on someone else. To me, this is blameworthy, because the only way I can have that opinion in the first place is if I violate one of Jesus’ teachings in the Sermon on the Mount: Judge not. For, how would I know what the other person should do, unless I’d evaluated them in some way and found them wanting?

On the other hand, I would throw myself in front of a train to keep someone I care about from having to learn things the hard way, the way I did. The suffering my mistakes caused me has given me some experience in the ways of evil, and how to avoid suffering by avoiding sin. But I also know I wasn’t listening to anyone else when I made those mistakes, and well-intentioned counsel from friends and family just made me resist their advice because I felt judged. I felt no one understood me, so how could they know what was best for me? And I stumbled along my own path alone.

The turning point came when I’d suffered enough that I actually did ask someone to judge me, and to tell me what to do. I was living out in LA and turning my life around. Part of that turning was being active in a local church. I even taught Sunday School there. Hanging around with all these genuinely Christian people had an effect, and I began to question some elements of my own lifestyle. Was I living right? Did I deserve to be a member of this church, let alone influencing young minds in Sunday School? Eventually, this worried me enough that I went to the Sunday School superintendent, and asked her.

We met there in the Sunday School, at a little round table near the window. I poured out my heart to this sweet Christian woman, and, I’m afraid, in my eagerness to paint an accurate picture, I was fairly graphic in detail about what I’d been up to. Not the highest example of clean living to sully her ears that morning. In anguish I asked her, “What should I do? Should I keep teaching?”

I’ll never forget her response. With gentle tears of compassion in her eyes, she put her hand on my forearm on the table, and said, “God will guide you.”

I can still feel my jaw dropping and my eyes filling with tears of my own. That simple statement of faith in me, that I had my own connection with God that would answer my questions, set me on a new path of spiritual exploration. I left that meeting with a new direction, and did indeed find my answers. I did keep teaching, but I also began to live up to my own standards of what that meant. And eventually, clean living became a way of life.

Now, when someone tells me something they’re doing that I wouldn’t do, I try not to react. I try to recognize that just because I wouldn’t do it at this point on my spiritual path, this doesn’t mean they don’t need to learn from it in their own time. Each person’s path is individual to them. If I did state my opinion, they might feel judged, and then I’ve just cut myself off from being able to help them later if they need it.

So instead I remember the example of that dear lady in LA. I express my confidence that God is guiding them and that they can listen for God’s direction. And, if they ask me to pray for them, I pray along those lines, opening thought to God’s direction rather than my limited point of view. Where they’re led often surprises me, but it works for them.

Judge not. No “should.” To me, it’s about not standing in the middle of the road on someone else’s path, but getting out of the way so they can see more clearly what’s ahead.

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Rays from the same lamp

Finished watching a fascinating film last night: The Message (1976). I say “finished” because it is three hours long, and it took me two nights to watch. But it was well worth it.

It’s the story of Mohammad, Prophet of Islam. It stars Anthony Quinn, so perhaps like me you would have assumed Quinn played the Prophet himself. But the film starts with this note:

“The makers of this film honour the Islamic tradition which holds that the impersonation of the prophet offends against the spirituality of his message. Therefore, the person of Mohammad will not be shown.”

Unusual to watch a film in which the main character is never depicted! But it made me realize, truly everything we know about our religious leaders is derivative. We know about them through their followers.

Early in the film, Mohammad’s followers find themselves seeking refuge in Abyssinia. They are taken before the king, who is Christian, to see if he will allow them to stay in peace, or throw them in chains for their actions in Mecca. Here is the defense one of the pilgrims offers:

“For years we worshipped wood and stone, images of our own manufacture. We lived in ignorance of God. We had few earthly laws and no heavenly laws. The rich neglect the poor, and the natural pity of man whereby he lifts his brother up when is fallen is described by them as upsetting social order. To this inhumanity has come a man whom God chose, and in that we believe.

“I speak of the Messenger of God. Mohammed teaches us to worship one God, to speak truth, to love our neighbors as ourselves. To give charity—even a smile can be charity. To protect women from misuse, to shelter orphans, and to turn away from gods of wood and stone.”

The king replies, “What Christ says and what your Mohammad says is like two rays from the same lamp.”

The pilgrim then recites what the Qur'an says about the birth of Jesus. “In the name of God, most gracious most merciful, relate in the book the story of Mary. How she withdrew from her family to a place in the east. How he sent to her our angel Gabriel who said, I am a messenger from your God to announce the birth of a holy son to you. She said, How shall I Mary have a son when no man has touched me? And Gabriel replied, For your Lord says it will happen. We appoint him as a sign unto man and a mercy upon us. It is a thing ordained.”

The Abyssian king replies, “The difference between us and you [draws on ground] is no bigger than this line.”

Granted, this film, like a lot of films about world religions targeted to a Christian audience, probably was trying to increase understanding between people. So it most likely chose episodes from early Islam that would contribute to that understanding. What struck me was the king’s reply: Basically, the difference between us is insignificant.

I stand with that Abyssian king. I believe if you truly dig to the core of spiritual teachings, you find much more in common between them than the fuss we make over differences would imply. For some reason, most of us focus on the differences. Is it some attempt to feel more righteous, or to control, or to remain separate? I’m never sure what motivates that impulse to criticize. But for me, I’ve tried to train myself to find and build on the commonalities, to make them the focus of conversation when I meet someone of another faith, to appreciate the good and do my best to understand.

The substance of any spiritual teaching is its genuine spirituality. And you can find that spiritual core in all the world’s long-lasting teachings. The differences are often simply a matter of semantics. Focusing on the spirituality of the teaching, I think, makes it easier to discern what elements of the teaching are more human in nature and therefore perhaps a function of a certain era, tradition, or geography. All teachings have developed these human aspects that need to be understood as human, not divine. But the spirituality is universal, and it transforms and heals no matter where it’s found.

There’s a short but powerful book I highly recommend: Islam: A Short History, by Karen Armstrong. A quick but fascinating read, this book helped me see how history has shaped current divisiveness. And now that I have learned this, I feel responsible for turning that tide of history in whatever way I can—by listening, understanding, appreciating. Finding the connecting points and celebrating them. For, we are all rays from the same Lamp.

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Best friends forever

Very weird dream last night. It involved a friend from my youth. She and I were seeing each other again after 22 years and trying to catch up while getting lost driving to the church I attended as a child. We wound up in the Chicago Loop, which had turned into a huge Disney store.

To me, if you can believe it, this was all about regret. This friend and I had had a falling out right after her divorce and before mine, when I was still in my self-righteous phase. Not a good phase to be in when a friend’s going through tough times. My attempt at support was along the lines of: “I told you he was a jerk.” So she stopped communicating with me, probably in self-defense. I’ve tried a couple times in the intervening years to be in touch, to no avail.

Regret. The things in our human lives we really can’t fix. Sometimes it can weigh heavy. And to know that someone still hasn’t forgiven you and probably never will is humbling, even when you spend your days now trying to help others.

I have a few such things in my past, where I did damage to people that didn’t deserve it. And it’s occurring to me today that maybe there is something I can do about it.

First, I suppose I have to forgive myself. Sometimes I hang onto my mistakes as a sort of penance, continuing to punish myself for them to be sure I’ve learned my lesson thoroughly. But there’s a point where you need to say, I’ve learned enough. I’m actually not that person anymore, I’m not capable of inflicting that kind of hurt anymore. Not that I still don’t make mistakes—I certainly do. But I did learn from the prior zingers and know better now in those areas. For example, now, when a friend is going though a break-up or a tough time, I listen.

Second, if I’m feeling regret for hurt I caused to someone, I can pray for them. This is just occurring to me this morning. I may never see my friend again, but I can pray for her. Not to change her life or influence her in any way, but to hope for her happiness and success. To hold her in the arms of divine Love, knowing that she has the love that I wasn’t able to show her. That she’s never been abandoned or hurt. That God is her husband, even as He has been mine all these years.

And third, of course, is to live correctly now. To see and circumvent the hurt my failings might be causing today, to ameliorate it by expressing self-knowledge and love. I’m much quicker to apologize these days than I was as a youth, not only because I feel responsible for my mistakes but because I know too well the taste of regret for goodness left undone.

Yet I’ve also grown in the understanding that my mistakes are not the final word on my true identity. My spiritual selfhood doesn’t make mistakes, because it’s the emanation of the One who is mistake-free, perfect, holy. This mortal seeming that is capable of making mistakes isn’t permanent. Mistakes and their aftereffects can be like water off a duck’s back—no cause, no effect. It’s from this basis that I try to make up for what I’ve done, honestly facing human errors while developing a deeper understanding of spiritual truth.

Today I’m praying for my friend, and others in my past for whom I wish I’d been a better friend. I’ll be their best friend today, in Spirit.

Divine Love corrects and governs man. Men may pardon, but this divine Principle alone reforms the sinner. God is not separate from the wisdom He bestows. The talents He gives we must improve. Calling on Him to forgive our work badly done or left undone, implies the vain supposition that we have nothing to do but to ask pardon, and that afterwards we shall be free to repeat the offence.

To cause suffering as the result of sin, is the means of destroying sin. Every supposed pleasure in sin will furnish more than its equivalent of pain, until belief in material life and sin is destroyed. To reach heaven, the harmony of being, we must understand the divine Principle of being.

"God is Love." More than this we cannot ask, higher we cannot look, farther we cannot go.

--Science and Health

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Christian Science treatment

I had a good talk yesterday with someone about Christian Science treatment, so I thought I’d share just a few of the things I’ve learned here. These are just my ideas—there are probably as many different ways to describe it as there are Christian Scientists. :)

What is Christian Science treatment? As you may already know, it’s an entirely spiritual form of treatment where the goal is to transform thought. This transformation of thought leads to increased harmony—in our lives, in our relationships, in our bodies.

So how does this transformation take place? And what are we transforming from and to?

To me, the transformation is from a solidly material self-definition to one that is more spiritual. It makes sense that you can gain this more spiritualized concept through a better understanding of Spirit. So for me, Christian Science treatment starts with gaining a deeper understanding of Spirit, God.

When I’m giving a treatment through prayer, I start by contemplating some aspect of God I’m already familiar with, then building on it. There are seven overarching synonyms for God in Christian Science: Love, Truth, Life, Mind, Soul, Spirit, Principle. I’ll start with the one or perhaps two that most closely touch on the issue I’m praying about. For example, hypothetically, let’s say the issue is a pulled muscle. I might start with Principle. And then I’ll become mentally poised to receive a new concept about Principle that expands my definition of God.

My contemplation might go like this:

• Principle means the underlying law that governs all creation.
• This law is good, harmonious, perfect in every detail.
• This law is self-enforcing, since Principle is all-power.
• This law is fair, reaching everything in creation impartially.
• This law is reliable, it never changes or is at fault.

Ah-ha! In this example, let’s say that’s the new idea I was seeking—the idea of Principle’s reliability. Perhaps I’ve never thought about this before, or spent the time to become truly convinced of it. When I recognize the new idea, I dwell with it, letting it seep in to my consciousness fully.

It’s important to note that I don’t just recite memorized words to myself. Rather, in that space of contemplation, I’m genuinely letting the ideas flow, one from the other. They build, I contemplate, they transform, I grow. The ideas are always new. Each treatment is about new ideas, not rehashed ones. After all, transformation can’t take place when all you’re doing is going over old ground. You must be constantly breaking new ground to feel the effects of spiritual healing.

As I contemplate the new idea (Principle’s reliability in the example above), I begin to feel a sense of joy and conviction. I look for this feeling before I move on in my treatment. The discoverer of Christian Science, Mary Baker Eddy, writes, “You may vary the arguments to meet the peculiar or general symptoms of the case you treat, but be thoroughly persuaded in your own mind concerning the truth which you think or speak, and you will be the victor” (Science and Health). I strive to be “thoroughly persuaded” as a foundation for the entire treatment. It goes beyond mere words, I need to feel it to my core. I recognize this state by the joy, confidence, light it brings.

So then, at this point, I turn my thought to the patient, in this case the one with the pulled muscle. I see this patient as the image and likeness of the ideas I’ve just been contemplating. This patient is governed by the law that is harmonious and perfect in every detail. This law is fair and impartial, never causing pain but allowing freedom of movement. This law is reliable, and my friend (the patient) can lean on it without fear.

Seeing the patient as the express image of the Divine is part of that transformation of thought, since the goal again is to move from a material view to a more spiritual definition of being. This is what needs to change in order for healing to take place. This is the presence of the Christ, which Mary Baker Eddy says, “comes to the flesh to destroy incarnate error” (Science and Health).

Once my thought is “thoroughly persuaded” that the patient is the express image of the Divine, then and only then do I turn to face the problem. And often at that point, the problem is so self-evidently absurd that it can be dismissed with absolute authority. It might go something like this: “A pulled muscle? Ha! Not for my friend, the perfect image of perfect Principle. There is no vulnerability there, no unfairness, no pain. Only perfection. I therefore deny your ability to harm my friend, and I declare him free.”

This was a hypothetical, so I can’t tell you for a fact that someone was healed of a pulled muscle by the above. But this is the basic thought process I’ve used in the healing of other difficulties. Generally, I spend roughly 85% on the first part, about 10% on the second part, and about 5% on the final part. For me, it’s most effective to spend the lion’s share of my prayer time on cultivating a deeper understanding of God.

Please feel free to send along any questions you might have, and I’ll be happy to try to answer! You can ask yourself every day, What did I learn about God today? Whenever there’s a new idea, you can know you’re transforming thought, and therefore increasing harmony and peace in your own life and the lives of those around you. I’d love to hear about it!

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Poetry evokes

As most of my friends know, I’m no poet. :) Nor do I qualify as “into” poetry. That’s why it’s always surprises me when a poem catches me off guard.

I had ee cumming’s poem from yesterday, I thank You God for most this amazing, on my mind when I marched out for my early morning walk, pedometer firmly on belt, inspirational reading material in hand. My daughter taught me how to read while I walk, and I always multitask whenever I can for that extra sense of accomplishment.

But not yesterday. The sun, still in its soft phase streaming yellow mist through the summer green, called to me. Dewy grass and a chorus of birds would not let me alone. Even my neighbors’ early morning start on their commute was musical, a gentle wave “hello” and a swoosh of tires on asphalt.

Poetry makes me slow down. It makes me really look around me. It’s not something I can tell myself to do, I have to be told. Poetry tells me.

Poetry evokes—feelings I haven’t had, visions I haven’t seen, issues I haven’t explored. It brings me ideas I didn’t seek out. So I have to be receptive or off it bounces. Sometimes I am receptive, or sometimes the poetry is just so compelling I can’t help but respond.

The cummings poem always takes me off guard. I never feel like I’ve “gotten” it—it always has more to reveal to me. The Psalms do this for me as well (Veronika put one in the comments yesterday), as does John Donne when I take the time to read it (see yesterday’s comment from Karen for a great example). And here and there, a random poem will take my breath away.

To me, it’s like God communicating in another way that brings me the message on another level. Prose I get. I can study it, memorize it, analyze it. It’s all very rational. Poetry thrums the strings of emotion, having an impact that I can’t explain or rationalize. It takes me elsewhere. And I realize there’s a whole world of ideas that exist on another level, beyond the reach of rational thought. And sometimes I’m free enough to go there.

Any other favorite poems out there? Please send them to me. I’m in the mood for some free flying.

(now the ears of my ears awake and
now the eyes of my eyes are opened)

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